PeRsPeCtiVe & KeEpiN On

I read a post in a group today.  It was about people who’ve lost abilities in their lives causing them to have disabilities. I am no stranger to loosing things, having been a regular looser of car keys, favorite lipsticks, and more..

But loosing a freedom once experienced and taken for granted often results in periods of self pity, depression, anger, acceptance and more.  Usually a person may go through these things more than one time for an ability having been lost.  Thus causing yet a longer period of transition.

Couples can both morn these losses as well.  Not only is the person injured or effected, but so are the people around them.  It is a transition and a period of loss for all involved. 

Many times these feelings can be stuffed, depending on the amount of medical transition, intervention, or treatment. 

Well, this blog helps me deal with mine.  I still haven’t given up, I am still mad about my lost life, but I am moving on.  I wish I knew how long it would take. 

I have friends who were born with disabilities.   I know that they also go through the same types of feelings.  It isn’t easy watching the world float by or seemingly so. 

I don’t know why but it really helped me out to read that.  I mean I knew that stuff, but when you are going through it you some how loose it.  Perspective!

So, that being said and perspective being gained at least for the moment.  I will keep plugging away! SMILE!

 

So tomorrow I get to look forward to spending the entire day in the dental chair!  Yes, I am not kidding, the ENTIRE day.  I may not feel much like talking afterwards.  I don’t use dental anesthetic.  I hate those shots!  They hurt so much worse than the actual dental work in most cases.  Now the root canal I just had done ranked right up there with the shots but the pain was intermittent and it went away fast enough so I was glad I had stuck to my guns and much to the dismay of my dental students who work on me gutted it out. 

Tomorrow will be no exception.  I really really hate those shots, they hurt for days with me and hurt worse than the actual dental work.  So no shots for this girl.  So for Amy who dreads the dentist, I don’t but it certainly isn’t up there with my favorite things to do.  I can certainly understand why you hate it.  I used to dread it when I would have to get those shots. 

I figure if I can walk around with the large bone in my upper arm broken clean through for a few weeks, and not know it was broke, I can sit a day in a dental chair and get the worst done to me.

Before the accident I don’t know if I could have done these things, my pain level was still pretty high, but it seems now it is really off.  I’ve got more pain desensitization stories but I think what I’ve shared paints a clear picture. 

The PA who diagnosed my broken arm by pulling down on my hand still gets chills thinking about it.  She takes me seriously when I say there is something wrong but I can’t tell her what it is.  She will persist until it is figured out.  Wish I could sense things better physically. 

I guess that is why Luka is so important, I can’t and he can!  He makes a huge difference in my life!  I’ve been able to take less medication since I’ve gotten him!  Yippee!

So hopefully lunch will be with a friend tomorrow, so Jason won’t have to wait the WHOLE DAY IN TOWN with me.  8 hours of finding something to do is beyond what should be expected of him.  He will hopefully be able to drop me off in the morning and then pick me up around 4 or 5.  Becka I am sure hoping you can grab me for lunch! 

But I fear after this week I won’t see it until spring!  Hurry up spring!  I am sure missing you!  My gloves don’t even seem to keep the wind off of my fingers!  Brrrrr.r…r..r…r.

 

I’ve got the greatest friends!  I keep getting more and more of them!  While I’ve lost touch with many, lost respect for others, I still treasure the past but I am moving on to the future! 

I’ve branched out and am doing pottery with a new friend, and an old friend, she isn’t old just known for a while… That is new and fun for me, great for getting my hands back in shape.

I’ve been repairing clothing and have just consigned my first batch of it!  Yea!  I was going to sell it on ebay, I still may but I am trying this out first.

I am helping my fab hubby set up to take pictures and sell them.  At least that is the plan.  So if anyone wants their picture’s taken let us know!  He’s taken some great shots so far and he is super cheap!

I have even signed up an paid for a workshop.  Something that I’d stopped doing because I’d been paying all of this money and then not being able to attend and loosing all of my money due to migraines or too much pain or medication to handle attending.

I’ve missed attending all of my workshops, and the latest one is only putting me out $20 and it isn’t a pre pay workshop, I will pay when I arrive on site.  I like that too!  I’d like to sign up for more, but I will be doing this gradually.

My MK business in order to stay current with things needed that, I wasted so much money.  =(!

Isagenix things, well I haven’t done any of those.  I am not shelling out $$ and then not being able to go!  I just as well toss the money out the window while driving down the interstate. 

Ok, so I am finding other things to do to help myself.  Online training!  Online marketing, and email communications!  While not perfect, I find that many times I have a conversation with someone in person and I’ve forgotten things I promised, or what they shared.  I feel stupid asking them to repeat it…

Jason shares often – YES you’ve told me that 3 times now, or you’ve asked me for help with that 4 times now, I get it.  And here I am thinking that this is the first time I’ve mentioned it as I can’t remember if I had or not. 

This week I’ve also sewn a dog bed, actually the insert for a dog bed out of an old falling apart quilt.  Quite ingenious I think.  Folded in half and stitched, folded in half again and stitched before completely stitched it get’s stuffed, and then finished stitching, and Wala!  A dog cushion!  Yea!  We needed another one as the foster dogs we’ve had in the past shredded several of them.  So now I am collecting OLD BLANKETS, they can have holes stains or what ever… SHEETS QUILTS AND LARGE PIECES OF FABRIC will also work great! 

I will attach a picture sometime.  For now all of the latest pictures are on the hubbies computer I don’t have access to them… So check back, it is possible after reading this he will forward the ones I want on to me…. Thanks Honey! 

Well, I’ve gotta go, I’ve just brushed my teeth and I am going to sleep so I can be bright and perky tomorrow for the dental student.  I get a crown and a cleaning!  Yipee!

Blessings!

oK … yOu!

I am ok, you, get with the program!  This is something in one way or another I keep on telling myself.  Get on track stay on track, get it done, work on it now, so you’re not late!  Sometimes I am late anyway.

But this week, most of it which I can’t remember right now, I worked on setting myself up to be successful.

I plan for everything now.  It all takes extra time and effort.  It is worth it.

I am getting faster at things!  Which is a relief all unto its own. 

Oh, yea!  I had Physical Therapy this week!  My body finally got the latest exercise right!  I think 1/2 of my problem is that I don’t know how to control my muscles anymore, which should do what and which should do the other.  It isn’t something that just works for me.  I find I do things like walking one way, but that way causes pain… the right way well I haven’t completely got that one figured out, but the right way shouldn’t cause pain.  But I guess this is what all of these years in bed has done to me. 

So at therapy, my body got moving my legs right!  In one area!  Oh my it made such a difference!  I am looking forward to repeating it, I felt a significant difference after my work.  Not perfect but WOW!  BETTER!  Better is better!  I will definitely take better!

It has been a great week!  I was even able to host a party!  We had about 1/2 of the folks attend who RSVP’d which turned out just great!  It was so much fun to have people in my space.  I am not miss social like I was, but wow, I had a great time.  I missed having the energy to sit and talk with each person.  I did manage to get a welcome and a thanks for coming to most everyone though, I was able to participate, and keep things like food doing well.  Jason was the real host!  Quite the switch!  Not that he’s not been capable of that but I’d always taken the lead before.  He even went so far as to walk most everyone out! 

He cleaned like a maniac all day and even worked on it prior to that day as well.  Taking me grocery shopping and patiently waiting while I did all that I could do and then he’d finish up the rest.  He’s just been so great!  THANKS BUNCHES BABE!

Now today, I slept almost all of it or hopped on the computer, then slept, watched a football game, and slept through it a bit too.  I got up about 6 or so fed the boys, they’d been so good sleeping with me!  I’d been in quite allot of pain and could hardly move, I managed to get rid of the migraine I had, the clue I couldn’t see when I woke up was a definite give away today!  I had thought I might need a little rest after my busy day yesterday, I think tomorrow will be better, but wow, writing this I am so tired again as well.  It was so worth it!  I miss seeing people, I miss entertaining! 

I used to do a party every week!  I was never the best party thrower, but I had a great time, and so did the MK gals that came!  While last night wasn’t a MK party, it was just something for our friends.  It was wonderful.  I do one tomorrow again if I could, but I don’t think my body will be thinking the same thing.  Maybe soon! 

Jason even had a great time, I think he was initially mad at me for inviting people over.  He hates that our house isn’t perfect, that we have so many issues that need fixed.  He doesn’t feel good about sharing our unfinished home with others.  He is a perfectionist.  The fact that we don’t have a “REAL” floor covering in his mind, or that people have to enter our home through the garage because we have no front steps…

My take on it is exactly the opposite.  We live where we live if they don’t like it they don’t have to come over!  We are not where we live!  I won’t apologize for something I can’t do anything about!  When I can’ do something about it I will, but I am not letting that stop me from having people in our lives and in our home. 

He had fun!  He really did!  He did the best job ever!  It was wonderful to see him so happy!  I know that he made others feel great also!  We are going to do it again!  It won’t be for a little while, we deserve it and so do our friends!  A little fun with friends makes the bad stuff disappear!  He may even end up loving his new role as host!

My life is getting better and better!

Blessings and grateful thoughts!  I am going to take another Apple Cider Vinegar bath now and go back to sleep, the few hours I’ve been up have made me exhausted again.  And I’ve got party to clean up for tomorrow!  Yes it can wait yet another day!  HUGS!

AmAziNg GrAcE

As I seem to have taken another break from posting.  I have actually been trying to write, but the last few things I have managed to get out of my head, were just not appropriate to share. 

I was informed last night before Jason fell to sleep that I hadn’t been doing my part about keeping him informed about what was going on with me.  He pointed out that my last post was well, a while ago. 

Things have actually been going pretty well.  I have noticed an improvement in how my neck has been feeling.  One day a few weeks ago while at my Massage Therapy appointment, I noticed a marked improvement.   I hadn’t really told anyone about it as I didn’t know how long it would last.  I still seem to be feeling better from it.  While not perfect, the daily pain is still here, but it isn’t quite as bad.  Something changed during that appointment.  I am not sure what.  But it made a significant difference.  Things just haven’t been as severe pain wise. 

I am so happy for that.  But with my decrease in neck pain, I have increased my activity some.  Ok, so it isn’t much, because I still FEEL my neck pain significantly.  But I am not holding my head as much when I bend over!  That means I can have two hands!  YEA! 

Hey people that is a big deal!  Yes, on the days where the migraine’s are present, I am holding my head.  My migraines are not quite as bad now either!  That is another thing I noticed.  Woot!  Woot!  I am using less medication to get rid of them!  I will take it! 

I couldn’t drive today, the pain is to bad to be behind the wheel of the car.  But I am resting then typing then resting then typing resting and typing!  I am typing this, and I am also working on a man’s resume.  He really needs my help, and I feel good helping him.  I don’t know that I could do this regularly, as it does take quite allot out of me doing it, but I do feel good about it.  But you never know!  I could do one a month or so maybe!  It is nice to help people who couldn’t afford a professional!  I am free, and not a pro!  I was just taught these skills from helping my mother critique them, she was a pro at it.

So, I’ve been doing more!  And loving it.  This has it’s own challenges as well.  I had gotten to where I was doing more at Physical Therapy as well.. I haven’t been able to go for a while now, due to Jason’s schedule, and me not being able to drive on certain days like today. 

But tomorrow I will make it.  Jason will be driving me!  Woot!  I’ve had problems with my joints shifting out of where they should be.  My right side is by far the worst at it, but the left side shifts around as well. 

I usually don’t notice much pain except for just the regular daily pain that I have in my joints.  When my arm unsuctions from my shoulder then goes back in that is un nerving to say the least.  Besides being gross!  Then it also hurts on top of it, which is oh so fun!

But on Saturday we were out celebrating!  Which I love because it was the first time in YEARS that we actually got to go out for our Anniversary!  We went out with friends!  It was wonderful!  Jason’s froggy voice and all.  I wasn’t sure if we were going to be going.  I wasn’t holding us up this year he had come home from his major days of working 24/7 for multiple days in a row with out his voice!  Gotta love that.  He napped all afternoon!  The man who can’t nap fell asleep on our anniversary!  I made cookies!

We attended an Open House!  It was wonderful!  I will share more about the place we went later.  As the plan is for me to go back this week!  Our friends had friends, who have a pottery studio!  They sell their pottery at several galleries!  That is so cool!  I had RSVP’d and so I got to paint a couple of their pots to take home!  I had so much fun!

Sitting their painting my pots, I had an unfortunate incident.  Which once again makes me so glad that I had Luka with me!  He came right in the pottery shop with me and hung out!  They even gave me a chair to use so I could sit and paint, everyone else did their standing.  But while sitting on my nice chair… my right leg slipped out of it’s socket in my hip when I shifted my leg to turn a different direction.  OMG PAIN PAIN PAIN,,, Holly Cats Pain!  I didn’t know if I was going to be able to get it slipped back in or not.  It just was seeming to stick out of joint this time.  I just remember thinking stay calm stay calm relax relax relax breathe breathe, Oh my, Jason is going to be so mad!  Just sit here, relax relax relax…   Ok now try again move slow…  breathe breathe…  Oh my it hurts it hurts….  this isn’t good…. 

As I wiggled my leg, then lifted my leg with my hands, then moved my hip, it went back in.  OMG@@@@@@!!!!!%%%!!*****   Well.. You get the picture!  It hurt almost as bad as when I broke my arm in 1/2 and worse then when I had burnt myself in the oven the week before.  I think it only hurt less than breaking my arm as it was a short amount of time. 

After this little incident I couldn’t walk on my own at all.  Which is always so lovely!  Luka was a fabulous help!  He knew I was hurting and did just great.  By the end of the evening I was doing better the pain level I was in had dropped significantly and it was easier to get around.  I didn’t take any chances Luka had been put to sleep in the Jeep, it was way past his bed time my old guy was tired!  So Jason stuck to me like glue after that!  Yea! 

I was able to finish my pottery painting, I hung out with our friends, and made bunches of new ones as well!  It was such a nice evening and everyone there was real and regular!  I loved it, it was the type of environment that Jason is comfortable in so I had a great time knowing he was doing well there too! 

As it turned out, my pottery pieces turned out wonderfully!  Raku Pottery is what we did!  I will put pictures here of what I did!  The DeDe the gal who’s studio was asked if I would paint up some more for her so she could sell them! 

Of course!  I would love to do that!  I was just thrilled to be back in a pottery studio!  The last time I was I think was either at the University or in my Kozzi’s art room at her college both were prior to my marriage.  Which has now been 11 years!  Yipee!

My friend Wendy and I are headed back there.  I wonder what we will do this time?   DeDe shared that she thinks she can help me to throw pots too!  That is something that I have never been good at.  She has a wheel that is tall that I wouldn’t have to bend over to use.  Gotta dig out some old warm clothes for this adventure!  I have a feeling if I start throwing I am going to be a M E S S!  I always had done slab work.   I thought I’d never be able to do it again but they have all of the tools at their studio that make it easier!  With multiple people there as well, I can ask for help!  So this might just work out wonderfully, we’ll see!

I was going to be an art teacher after all when I was enrolled in college. 

Jason went back to work on Sunday and I rested after my long day on Saturday.  Monday was like that too, I tried to do some things, I managed to get the kitchen cleaned up from making dog food on Friday night.  Thank goodness for my friend Carolyn who came over and helped me with that. 

I was so happy I could get groceries on Thursday!  But by the time I got home I was too tired to haul them in.  It was cold that night thank goodness, so I just left everything in the car.  The next evening I went out to get the things.  I got them in as I needed to make dog food.  I couldn’t do it on my own.  So I called Carolyn!  She is a blessing.  I hadn’t called anyone for help most people are so busy, they’d help if they could or if it would be an emergency, but aren’t available in general spur of the moment.  Thank goodness Carolyn was.  She was going to help me again this week, to finish cooking and freezing the squash.  But I don’t think I am going to get that done this week.  I already have to many things pending.  Thankfully we got enough squash cut up and potato’s cooked for the next batch of food.  So things will be fine until I can get the next cut and cooked.

So Luka’s new diet which has stopped his chewing of his feet is working well.  The all over swelling of his body and the hot spots that would crop up on him all over has disappeared for the most part too.  But it is taking a toll on me and our budget.  So I am also researching some other ideas to include as well.  

He is allergic to all birds, all grains, and milk!  YIKES!

His food now is

Deer meat ( have extra you don’t want send it our direction) 

Canned Salmon- Which I am right now as I type this just watching on the ABC Nightly News probably has BPA in it and it was shown to cause harm in animals.  GEESH!  They are also concerned about it for people too!.. OMG!  WHERE IS THERE SAFE FOOD!  I am now going to look for FROZEN…. GRRRRR!  Canned foods will be leaving my cupboard for sure!  I don’t need any extra help in feeling crummy! 

Squash – All types ( right now that is what is in season)

Potatoes- Yea!  Those are affordable!

Pumpkin- Yup I am cutting those up too!

Garlic-

Olive or Canola Oil- Depending on price

Ground Flax Seed

I’ve also been putting my Isagenix Shake and protein in his food each day too.  Making sure he gets enough protein, and vitamins. 

I have been researching other foods as well.  Dick Van Patton makes a food that might work into his plan!  So that is on my list of things to get and try for him as well!  The last food that was a two ingredient food did help with the allergies, but it was hard to get I need a prescription, and besides being expensive he was lethargic on it and that just won’t do!

Now back to the other night!  Because one of the most amazing things that happened is that a friend of our friends who also attended the party, Jennifer, she is a Physical Therapist who specializes in Migraines, as well as new technology!  She shared that she wanted to help me, she wants to take me on as her special project!  Oh My!  What a wonderful end to a great evening!  I’ve been reading up on the technology she has access to!  I am so excited!  It sounds perfect for me!  (not that I am a Dr.) She shared that she thinks that I would be a perfect candidate.  She also shared that when she saw me she thought I had MS.  I suppose I do look like I have something like that.  I will have to do the research as to the similarities.  AS I know I don’t have that but I wonder if things that help the people with that would help me too?  Hmm..

I have to say that when she started sharing with me about what she does and where she worked, I was like yeah yeah yeah… I’ll just listen to her and then go back to painting away.  But I actually did listen to her.  The more she shared the more she intrigued me.  I found myself still wanting to shut the ideas she was sharing out of my head.  I consciously had to remind myself once again, that you never know where the miracle is going to come from.  God has a plan!  It is not my plan it is his.  I need to be open to ALL opportunities even if they come in unexpected packaging.  So I am taking another step in faith…  Just like a year ago with the Isagenix which has been a miracle for me.  I just follow the plan and do what I am told under no circumstances will I give up, and if I fall off I get back on and go at it with all I’ve got!  I don’t plan on being like this forever, I have no intention of getting worse and having to stay in bed again!

Jennifer!  I am ready!  Let’s go! 

 

I feel pretty good about all that I’ve been doing! 

1. Thanks to Massage Therapy Increased Activity and Less Neck Pain

2. Thanks to Physical Therapy adjusting my hip (yes the same one that gave me trouble on Halloween)  I can move without pain much easier and I am getting STRONGER! 

3. Luka is doing better and is a better Service Dog for me as a result!

4.  I have written 2 resume’s for people already this year and am working on my third

5.  I have an opportunity to make pottery!

6.  I have great friends who are so supportive, which means the world to us!

7.  Awesome Dr’s and Therapists

8.  Keeping an open mind about people and things in my path.

9.  Getting things I’ve promised done done.  While they aren’t many I am following through.

10.  I’ve lost 55 pounds which has made a huge difference in how I can get around.  It makes it so much easier on Jason when I need carried as well. 

11.  Driving, I am doing more and more.

12.  Walking I am doing more and more!

13.  Emotionally I am hanging in there, and so is Jason!  Phew, it has been so tough!

14.  For the most part I have also managed to stay out of the ER except for a few falls!  That is a marked improvement as well!

15.  I am learning more and more about being healthier, which I had never been consumed by before.  I am more educated than ever, although my mom had done a pretty good job with me.  (Like I haven’t drank soda for almost 10 years except for a few sips every now and then when nothing else was around.) 

16.  Our bills are paid on time!  We are getting things paid off like the bed we got!  Before we invest in other things!  One thing at a time!  Cash is king baby!  Thanks to my money making hubby!  You rock, we are doing it!

17.  I have begun helping others feel better with my Isagenix!  I am so grateful for that!  If you want to know more about it too, let me know!  Send me an email at shine.shimmer.sparkle@gmail.com   I will share some information with you.  I feel guilty not helping others.  Even just for the vitamin aspect of it it is worth it, I feel so much better since the first week I was taking it!  I never want to stop!

18.  I’ve been managing my PTSD better since Luka has become my Service Dog.  Still got a ways to go, but I am thinking about sticking myself back into treatment for it.  (The last day I had an appointment for my PTSD was on the day of my accident, it was a really great day up to the crash I was looking forward to my appointment, I had really begun to make some great progress!)  I’d been putting off going back because multiple health care appointments in a week/day focused on my physical health has been about all I can handle.  Dealing with the issues that are behind my PTSD are a whole new ball game of exertion.  Staying as happy as possible has been my other focus, can’t go back down the deep depression path!  Digging into my past didn’t fall into the “happy” category, not sure it does now either.  It is just another thing that needs to be done.  Of course that is another bill that will be landing on our doorstep.  Need to weigh the costs of that as well.

19.  My dental plan is on track fixing the teeth wrecked by having those fentanol lolly pops in my mouth for years.  So far 2 finished crowns, 1 root canal and a pending crown with I think at least 3 more to go!  Geesh, that comes with its own price tag.  Better than having no teeth!  Jason is on this track as well too!  Getting his whites all pearly!  As much as we both just LOVE sitting in the dentist chair!  We go to a local college and let the student’s practice on us so we can more easily justify having teeth!  Which is painstaking, literally and figuratively!

20.  I still hurt pretty much everywhere, but I can now hold my head up, I can walk more than a few blocks, I can do things and rest then do things and rest and do things and rest!  Point being I can do things!  I am still married to the greatest guy ever!  Who sticks to me like glue even when he might not really want to!  I am not stuck in my bed, or house anymore!  (ok so the ice isn’t hear yet- don’t plan on walking on that stuff!)  I am skinny and can wear pretty much anything which in itself is fun!  Good Will and consignment shops are still my favorite places to shop!  Even though I love designer clothes ( Amazing things can be found there! Things that you can actually afford! )  I have a great old Service Dog! 

 

I miss the life I had that is for sure!  I am starting to like the one that is unfolding before me.  That in it’s self is a blessing! 

Life is full of beauty even if all you can do is watch it out your bedroom window!  I should know!

Oh My oH mY!

Things to do places to go.  I can’t seem to ever get caught up.  I’ve had to miss therapy for a while now.  I know that I will be worse for it.  I am doing what I can on my own.  Unfortunately for many things I still need supervision… DRAT! 

Oh, well.  That’s just the nature of the beast lately.  Today has been spent going through the stack of papers and things I need to get done regarding the papers.  It is 7 pm and I still haven’t even had the time to write out the bills.  But I am knocking off things one by one. 

Writing this is hardly a necessity, but it makes me feel better to do it.  Getting stuff out of my head is sure a big help for me.   I’ve got quite allot left to do.

But I can’t help but feel starting new things when I have yet to complete things that are started but unfinished is wrong.

I’ve been planning to get a box of goodies sent to the Kyle’s in Iraq.  I thought we’d find some magazines and things like that to send, but Jason didn’t know what they’d like.  So I am filling the boxes up with cookies. 

At the moment I think both of them have cookies to spare!  But another box is never a bad thing!  They can make some friends by sharing!

My niece made some spritz!  Jason made brownies, and I ma making my favorite MoNsTeR CoOkiEs, thankfully while on my grocery adventure the other day, I talked to a lady in the cookie isle.  She shared with me about how she found a great monster cookie recipe that was simple and easy.  That’s what I’ve needed.  All of this measuring mega stirring and all wears this girl out!  So I thought I’d give it a try too!  She said to grab two cookie mix bags then go to the site above and I’d find the recipe! 

I love it!  They were the simplest MONSTOR COOKIES I have ever made!  I used to make them allot!  It was much more difficult than this too!

Ok, I also added for my goodies, some granola instead of quick oats, a packet of breakfast oatmeal, 1/4 cup coconut, some peanuts, mini M&M’s, fancy chocolate chips, and Heath BITS!  MMMmmmmMMMMM   My house smells wonderful! 

I am going to freeze the cookies tonight!  Most are already in the deep freezer already!  Then I will pack them up tomorrow and ship them all off to Iraq, and pray they arrive safely to the guys!  I am including a note to in case someone has allergies… since peanuts and coconut are included. 

Ok it is testing time!  I get to taste test the “losers”  the “winners” go in the freezer!  I am washing them down with my Isagenix vanilla shake!  MMMMMMmmmmMM!

What a horrible job!  Hee Hee!!

Ok so I’ve taken some pictures, I will get them added later way to tired at the moment, I have yet to pack as well…

I have accomplished –Most- of my list.  So that is one good thing. 

Blessings

gReAt dAy!

Ok so what a great day today was!  As of late I am groggy waking up.  Don’t know what’s going on there.  Some days I am wide awake other days I am in a stupor for half of the day.  I am thankful that I had washed my hair the day before. 

I think that is about all I got accomplished yesterday, but hey, it’s all good!  Oh Oh!!  Yesterday I finally finished unpacking my bag from my trip to Grandma’s house.  Today I realized that I need to start packing it again tomorrow for our next trip.  Yikes!  Jason’s back to work at the hospital and we get to see our friends!  Woot!  I’ve got two days to get lots of gals called! 

So today, it was a beautiful day!  It was warm outside it wasn’t windy at all!  It was sunny and wonderful!  I made it out about 2:00 pm I sat outside and did my exercises outside. 

Getting started doing my ab breathing exercises,

Adding in the football!  I always wanted one of these, although I never thought this is what I would use this for.

The boys and girl enjoyed it too!   I didn’t get pictures of everyone, just Luka… the natives got restless and I had to put them back inside before I had my phone in my hands to take pictures. 

Luka hanging out in case I need some help.  Yes, he wears a pinch collar.  I know, it looks horrible.  He begs to wear it.  We’ve had to use this as somewhere along his life path, he lived with a cat, didn’t mind the cat.  Then somehow some where later, he was told it was alright to chase the cat and try to eat the cat.  So now he wears the lovely pinch collar, so I don’t get drug down the street when he sees a cat! 

Yea, he’s 110 lbs I am 120…. I don’t stand a chance except for this collar, and after more than a year he listens to me much better now, isn’t likely to try to drag me down the street, although he does still sometimes get so excited that he finds it very difficult to stay still.  Other than that we get along perfectly!  So we’ll keep working on the cat issue!

Luka’s only other issue is he loves little dogs!  All dogs really but the little ones for sure!  Crazy!  But he is doing so much better than before!  He does manage to do his job quite well!

Well enough in fact that today I was asked if kids could be trained to behave as good as he does.  I said I am sure they could, wink!  She said, I am just to busy for all that, do you train them?  …… time to walk away!!!   Yikes! 

So today Luka and I after our backyard adventure we made a trip to the bank Melanie, Deb, and the other gals were very cheerful today, then to the post office Brian was there!  Yea!  We sure miss having Brian at our post office!  The new gal Kim is nice too! 

We walked from store to store!  It was so great!  A nice day and I was feeling well to boot!  Yipee! 

The new clothing store was closed, boo!  But the gifty store was open of course, Mary was even there for a bit!  Pretty fun, the last time I’d seen her was at my friends funeral.  We sat together.  She was of course amazed at Luka’s stellar behavior!  They had the cutest hats in!  Not my size they were for babies, but maybe I can figure out how to make one for me!

Speaking of hats!  One of my most favorite blogs has their new shopping site up and running.  It isn’t perfect yet but it is almost there!  Check it out!  She makes hat’s and purses and sells patterns so you can make them yourself too!  Another one of the Australian Bloggers I love!  Her blog is wonderful as well!  BLOG!  I look forward to seeing all of the great things she comes up with! 

My journey continued today, since I was doing so well, I didn’t want to go home, it was about 5 or so now, and I was remembering a conversation I had before I hung out in my backyard?  My neighbor came by, shared that she was off to visit her hubby at the nursing home.  So I thought to myself, it’s been a long time since I’d gone down to visit him as well.  I’ve got the time and I don’t want to go home, Luka and I are doing well, and he had yet to go to the nursing home! 

I think they get therapy dogs in there!  The residents didn’t freak out at all!  But the sure did reach out and try to pet him.  YIKES!  Couldn’t let that happen!  To much commotion!  Can’t get him all excited now…  Gotta go see my neighbor, so we moved ourselves along a little quicker.  We sat in a high back chair for a while with him.  He’s almost blind, dumb macular degeneration!  Two of our friends have that!  (Onyx’s Momma has it too)  We stayed until he went to supper.  It was nice to get caught up!  Thank goodness for the high backed chair that I could curl up in! 

After that, I remembered that the dog food would run out tomorrow… and for our next trip I needed to have a bunch of it ready to go.  The allergies have for the most part dissipated.  Luka is having less and less hot spots and so I know we are on the right track.  I am still hoping to find a dry dog food that works for him too, but for now having to cook his food takes forever!  It however is good exercise for me I am sure!  10 lbs of potatoes takes some doing!  I have very sore arms when I stir those and standing while they cook well let’s just say after I do this I am resting!

He is also looking better too!  I add some of my Isagenix to his food as well.  It seems to be working!  So well in fact that Jason suggested that Ozzie be switched to the same stuff to see if he will add some pounds!  So far so good!  I don’t have a specific recipe but I just follow the foods that our vet suggested.

Luka has not had to wear booties for several weeks!  I am so grateful, as winter is coming and the snow, and water, mud, ice, etc. is rough on sock wearing!  Not to mention no one wants soggy socks squishing all over the floor. 

Yipee!  So we went to the grocery store after visiting the nursing home.  We talked to everyone in the store I swear!  Since we don’t get out much he and I are quite the novelty.  Even people who know me from before wonder what is going on.  Since I haven’t seen most of them for years. 

I may not have met many of them or then again I met so many people, that all over the county in which I live people at least know my name.  Weird and Cool!  I think more people know me here than where I grew up.  That is strange too, as I think I was in the newspaper every other week for something while in high school. 

Having gone back there a couple weeks ago, I remember how I can’t go anywhere without knowing someone!  Weird too as I’ve been gone over 20 something years!  It does give me a good feeling as I really like almost everyone I have ever met. 

So at the store, I was thrilled to see the laundry detergent on sale!  We stock up when this happens!  I would have bought more, but I don’t want to put us in the poor house, oh, wait, we are already there, hee hee!!!  WINK!

I also managed to get a good deal on fabric softener too!  I love it!  It felt good to do that.  I also found some brownies and met a gal in the store who shared with me how to make monster cookies quickly!  I can’t wait!  Boys in Iraq you are going to each get a box stuffed full of goodies!  Can’t figure what else to send to you besides food!  GRIN!

After I checked out a different neighbor came in to shop, we chatted for a while, that was nice, he’d been out mowing his lawn all afternoon.  Luka just laid there and waited watching all of the people come in and out of the store.  He is quite the topic of conversation… I find if I look people in the eye it gives them a lead in to ask all sorts of things.  so this is where the comment at the beginning of my post today fits in…

If I keep my eyes diverted I get away with less conversation.  Which has been most of my trips.  Today was different, I was doing so well today, I had the energy to talk to people.  So I could walk with my head up, taking my time to answer questions and talk to people.  I don’t mind this for sure, provided I have the energy to do it.  In fact I really do like the interaction.  That is one of the things that I miss the most.  I used to meet and talk to people everywhere!

Most day’s I am on a time crunch till my body starts wearing down and giving me fits.  When the pain becomes to great, my groceries will be left in the car to spoil, and so since I’ve spent Jason’s hard earned $$ on it I make sure to keep focused on getting home and things put away!

It was a fun day!  Be sure to check out my other blog!  The rescue is REALLY REALLY needing more people to step up and foster a dog!  I am sure that ours isn’t the only one overflowing either!  I know that the one my friend volunteers with is always looking too! 

Tomorrow will be another busy day!  That’s the plan anyway!

Blessings! 

Adopt A Dobe

http://www.adoptadoberman.blogspot.com/ Little Libby Needs A Home!

sLeEpY, ShOeS, SpArKLiNg LuKa!

Oh the sweet sweet dreams I hope to be having soon.  I am not sure what’s going on with me, I seem to go through stages like this. 

My whole body is exhausted.  I can’t hardly stay awake.  My limbs are heavy and my mind wants to turn off.  Which is a rare thing for me.  I am either very cold or quite warm, weird also, as the only time I usually get warm is when I am ill.  Of course that could be the case as well but I can’t tell.  No news there.  The last infection the Dr. found with me I must have had for months because I was really sick!  Didn’t talk much about that here, but it was pretty freaky how badly infected I was (not contagious ) It took two rounds of antibiotics very strong ones to clear, I am still not sure it is gone, I probably need to go get tested again but YUCK!  I don’t want to go back to the Dr.

I’ve also got to get this choking problem I’ve got checked out.  It is getting scary for me.  Ahhh, but as Jason shares most times I am choking, don’t worry you’ll pass out soon and then you’ll be fine.  Assuming of course that I have choked on something liquid. 

Lovely, that just gives you the idea of the type of compassion I’ve got here!  I know I know, I married a man who became a firefighter.  Patch ‘em up and Move them on.  This dealing with stuff long term is something that his manual doesn’t cover.

I started moving the clothes around in my closet today, the summer things to the back and the longer sleeved things to the front. 

I am not very excited about these clothes but hey, I will deal.  I’ve got some fun vintage coats to wear this winter.  The only drawback for me is that they are heavy.  But hopefully that also will mean that I will get some stronger muscles built up hauling them around.

Speaking of muscles, I am back to wearing my Doc Martins!  I love my steel toed shoes.  I have had them for YEARS!  I got them while visiting my sis in Arizona one year.  They are so old, but you’d never know it, they’ve worn the best of any shoes I’ve ever had, and I never treat them nicely!  I bought them at a chicken store.  So they were already having issues, but I didn’t care.  Even when I had more $$ to spend I didn’t like paying full price! 

I really feel like I got a deal with them!  They weigh about 4 – 5 pounds each I swear!  So I can really get some good muscles going when I wear them.

I noticed though that all of my sneakers, are the mesh type, my feet are FREEZING in them!  I need to find some leather ones that aren’t so breezy!  I have cold feet anyway and with the winter air blowing through wowie does that make them icy!

More of my shoe saga… I did manage to find this spring an 8 dollar pair or so of hiking boots from www.rei.com  I am really liking that store.  Of course I only get things on super clearance… but hey!  It is good stuff!  I really need to find some slip on snow type boots.  I of course love the Uggs! Talk about out of my league.  My niece has decided she wants some shoes like that too!  I found some at target at least in their add.  I don’t know what their soles are like but the $22 or something price tag sounded much more reasonable.  Although I am waiting yet to spend that amount right now too.  I did tell my sister about them in hopes that my niece would have some great new boots to use when she heads off to school!

I’d sure like to get some riding type boots too brown and black.  I have some knee length boots, unfortunately they all come with heels….  and since the no heel rule applies for me even more in the winter… well.  Those are going to have to start looking for a new home. 

There is a new consignment shop that opened up in my town.  That is pretty cool.  I might take some of my things down there.  Surely someone would like some nifty things!  I am not ready to give up all of my cool shoes, but 2 pairs of the boots I have I might be willing to part with.  My red pair I can’t part with yet!  I sure love those!  I stick them on occasionally and stomp around in them.  I will post some pictures!  I wonder if I will be able to find red boots that are flat that I love….. hmmmm… 

Speaking of pictures… I finally bit the bullet and connected my crappy phone to the computer to sync and download the pictures I had taken. 

So here’s a bit of what I’ve been storing on my phone to share!

King Luka…. Da Dat Da Da Dat Daaaa!!!  After his bath in September!

 

It was a really beautiful day as you can see.  Gorgeous in the sunshine and cool in the shade!  This is the last day that I was able to spend time outside!  I am so thankful for this day!

I rested a while and then laid down a dry towel and did my therapy exercises while Luka stood guard enjoying the sunshine!

I just love how the trees looked in the sunshine!  This day was just outstanding!

Using my abs….

Upsi Daisy….  getting the abs to work and work….  Yea!

Luka attended my cousin’s wedding with me.  Here he is basking in the sunshine watching the world go by!

 

Ok, so I think I will share more of my pictures later.  I am also going to post some of me and my family on Facebook later so go check out my pictures there as well! 

Blessings!

SpRiNt ~ BlOgS! ~ $HoPpiNG ~ My dAy

Well, as days go this one is sure to be an interesting one for me. 

Due not to outside activities or influences, but because I am still so groggy after a seemingly 48 + hours of sleep.  Interrupted of course.  But none the less a foggy business the last two days have become.  I feel as if I am embarking on the next 24 hours of fog as well.  My mind seems all shuttered.  I’ve had a migraine for sure, not sure if it is still going on, it may be and that just might be the cause of my cloudy mind. 

I feel as if many giant cotton clouds have been shoved inside of my brain.  I am not with out pain, but the fog of it all seems to be over riding many sensations.  The day is a burr… Again a late wakeup, after an early to bed the evening before.  Jeepers…  I don’t want to take more pills just to be sure, but the closeness of Luka would give thought to a migraine being present, as he is like glue.

So maybe that should be my clue.  I surely can’t be driving around anywhere today, in fact I am quite sure that this is one of those days I shouldn’t even plan on walking much around my own home.  Every thing just seems wonkey and out of sorts. 

Gotta love the days like this.  GRRRRrrrrRRR….

On another note… I don’t subscribe to any magazines, I wish I did I used to.  I’ve gone through all of the one’s that I’ve been gifted.  I don’t know why but I love love love fashion.  I always have.  House fashions, Men’s fashions, All Fashion.  I love crafts, jewlery, shoes, sewing,,,

I find it all fascinating.  Some of my favorite magazines I go through many times, others it is a once through and to the trash or on to the next lucky person to peruse the pages.

The internet is fun I have found to use in place of magazines as well.  I love looking at some fun shopping sites.  I love designer things!  Why? 

Somehow they use a better quality of fabric that you can find at department stores or discount stores.  They are sewn on the bias, and they don’t twist or hang funny when you wear them.  Someone has taken great care in assuring that the garment will last and flatter.

I used to spend my time looking around in fabric stores for this type of fabric.  I’ve come to the conclusion that the Midwest is not in the market for these fabrics, and that I have to settle for the fact that I will never find them.

Which now is beside the point as I have already so many projects to finish that I have ideas’ for that I could never get anything else finished in my lifetime I am sure.  ( ok so that may be a bit of an exaggeration)

I have taken to perusing some designer discount sites.  I will post here some great invitations for you to check out!  You have to register to see the great offerings.  I really like looking at them dreaming that some day they may end up being on my arm or draped flowingly over my body.  I think many of them would make wonderful gifts for those that I know and maybe someday I would be able to afford them at their discounted prices without feeling guilty for buying one of something that at a discount store would have paid for 10…. 

Somehow they have their rewards as well, as discount store purchases rarely last as long, hold up as well, and can fade or look dingy after a very short period of time. 

I’ve always been taught, when it comes to staple items in your wardrobe, get the best as you can afford.  Get the items that are short time items at the discount stores.  You will end up with a quality wardrobe that will last for years.  Black slacks, Basic’s such as belts, Shoes, and Jackets fall into this category for sure.

Well at any rate, here are your invites to my top 2 sale sites!  Enjoy! 

In order to join you must have gotten this invitation! 

http://www.ruelala.com/invite/lovinit  When you register I think you will get a gift certificate for $10 Free from me!  It is kind of cool too because with your first purchase I think that gives me $10 too!  How fun is that!

http://www.ideeli.com/invite/girlygirly  This site does something similar too! 

 

I am also becoming quite the blog reader.  I really love things from seeing how things are made, to well really most anything.  I find that my attention varies with the day and what I am doing or how I am feeling at the moment. 

I read one on Yoga, many on stuffed crafts, some on service dogs, others about those going through health challenges, some from medical professionals, others in business/marketing, etsy artisans, dogs, cooking, parents, friends, sewing, crafting, disability, life in general, news worthy, oh my the list goes on and on. 

One of the main themes I have found of blogs that I love are those written by people from other countries.  Right now most from Australia which I find odd, as it has never been on the list of places that I’d most like to visit.  That may be changing for me as I find so many blogs from that region so interesting.

While I don’t read each post thoroughly, some I do.  I flit about as my interests of the day change.  I use Google Reader to keep track of them all.  I have posted a few that I like on this site as well.  Those that mainly pertain to my situation.  I may post some others soon as well, as I enjoy so many of them and you might as well. 

Changing subjects yet again.  Onyx’s mom called today.  She shared she is doing much better!  Onyx the black lab who’s been staying with us for a few days now, is doing just perfect.  She is a good girl and all of us are not minding her visit one bit. 

On another note.  My phone issues I fear are not over.  Upon returning to Sprint 5th or 6th time this month~, instead of going to Physical Therapy GRRrrrrr, we were told in light of our problems with the refurbished phones, I could have a new one!  Yea! 

They gave me the choice of 3 different versions.  I use a windows based version.  It took me a while to understand the particulars on how to use this one, and I have been on a constant learning track with it.  I can’t imagine switching to a different kind.  I have difficulty remembering all of the new things I need to know.  Names especially take me so much longer than they once used to.  I was a whiz at them before.

Two of the versions had keyboards on their front panel, the other was a new Mogel, instead of a refurbished model.  I opted for the New Mogel.  I have no problems with the phone except it hasn’t worked.  They of course wouldn’t give me the latest model in the series leaving it as bait for me to purchase.  ( which there is now way that could happen as our finances are so tight )  Which is why I pay the outrageous fee’s for insurance. 

My new model should be in on Tuesday.  Then I can download all of my pictures to my computer, HOPEFULLY, as the new model should work perfectly!  Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Actually I may even end up connecting this unworking version as I am feeling desperate in knowing that so much is not backed up.  If there were to be a glitch everything new would be lost.  Quite frustrating.  Ahhh the joy of the electronic age. 

Well, enjoy your Saturday whether it involves shopping, football, working, or a relaxing day of laundry. 

Blessings!,

iNsPiRe ~ DeSiRe ~ fRuStRaTiOn

Hot cold Hot cold Hot cold~ tired Excited tired Excited tired Excited…   Doesn’t seem to matter which way the wind blows…  Funny how life works.

I’ve got a head full of ideas, things I would like to do, places I would like to go, people I want to see.  It doesn’t matter how I feel my mind is still dreaming, planning, thinking.  I just wish my body would cooperate! 

I mean it is to some degree.  Things are better.  I do have some really decent days!  My list of things to do seems to get longer instead of shorter.  I have so much to do around here I could never leave the house.  On the other hand I have so much I need to do outside of this house I could never come back. 

For those who have nothing to do everything is due.  Most things get done in some fashion.  Some faster than others.  Priorities of course.  The worst first, getting the most difficult out of the way. 

That thought doesn’t seem to let me have to much fun but the worst things are usually the ones that are the most pressing.  The things I actually enjoy doing I never seem to have time for.  They get pushed out of the picture.  That is why it is so nice to get away from here. 

I can’t wait! 

My Grandmothers were both quite different people, yet their sense of family was strong.  They were both determined one more passive than the other.  You could say one was down to earth and very focused on the past and heritage, the other lived in the present moment, not even really thinking of the future. 

I seem to have things planned out in advance four or five steps ahead, and for a variety of scenarios.  But having grown up around them both, I have a deep appreciation for the past, and the present.  And as we all no the only time we actually do our living is now. 

I got my therapy in today, driving myself of course, dropped a sweatshirt off for Jason at work, and came home in time to meet with a friend about Isagenix.  His wife had asked me to share with him.  Which was pretty cool. 

Not expecting anyone to do what I do, I do enjoy sharing.  I never know who will benefit from something, and I sure enjoy when people think enough of me to share things with me.  Even if they might not be for me. 

This husband gets approached by quite a few people about allot of different types of things.  He gave me quite a compliment, He said he was only listening about this product because I was the one sharing it with him.  He blows most people and products off. 

I really appreciated that.  I’ve worked very hard to build a level of trust with people.  I am so glad that people really respect that I am serious about what I share. 

It takes allot for me to have enough enthusiasm and faith in something to put myself out there and promote it.  I really have to believe in it, it really has to meet my integrity level.   Which not many things do.

So many of the women I recruited into my unit had the same level of integrity as well.  I think that is one of the reasons that each of them are so successful in all that they do. 

One of the gals was a house cleaner, I really respect the work she does, I used to do that.  She does it so well, like my aunt, fanatical about it!   Many others are in the teaching/speech pat professions and work with kids.  Wow, it takes something special to do that, and they all take such pride in it.  None of them were those burnt out teachers, all of them were there for the kids because they loved it!

Mothers, Wives, Students, Professionals, they each did their jobs to the best of their abilities, accepted no compromises from themselves, and set the example actually still do, in what they do.  I just loved that about them.  The fact that they have such integrity, enthusiasm, dedication, loyalty, and caring for what they bring to the world is so inspiring!  It made me want to do better and better for them. 

My gals in Brazil were so much the same way!  I think that is why in spite of everything they are still so successful!  I am so proud of them too!  Careers for women in Brazil are so much more limited, and the income opportunities are much more constraining.  But my gals have stepped up and stepped out into greatness!  I just love it! 

When each day is a fight like today was, therapy was very difficult for me today.  I am so sore, after my two appointments, I came home and just slept most of the evening.  Thank goodness we don’t have a foster puppy right now.  I’d have seriously neglected them today.  We’ve got our crew of two old guys, and our friends old gal!  They all are quite content to sleep right along with me.

I will share sometime soon some fun shopping websites for those of you who love really great things, but don’t like to pay full price for them.  I don’t have the $$ to order from them, but I treat them like the catalogs I receive, looking at the beautiful things and dreaming.  In my catalogs, I get my permanent marker out and do lots of circling!  Makes me feel good to do that!

Kind of like shopping but without pulling out my wallet!

Tomorrow holds more therapy!  Gotta take my phone back into Sprint for the latest crappy replacement phone.  I am so tired of spending my time in that store, up till now for at least 7-8 years I think we’ve been super happy with Sprint and the quality of product they provide.  But after having to already switch out my phone 4 times this month due to their inability to provide me with a working refurbished model..  I am getting quite frustrated!  I have a spare phone, but it doesn’t hold my calendar on it.  With my issues I have that is a very important function for me.  GRRRRR….  Guess tomorrow I will be sitting in their office yet again!  If you’ve been calling or texting and I’ve not responded…. Well, call the house!  Or call Jason.  GRRRRR…

 

Well, Hugs, and Blessings Nighty Night!

iNsPiRaTiOn 1o1

Inspiration- so many things to me fall into that category. 

Some of the things are small, like how our 14 year old foxhound keeps rising for the day each morning.  ( ok so some days he is up at noon with me )  Each morning I find him to be motivating.  If he can do it I can do it.  He wakes, lays there for a minute or two, stretches, and decides if it is time to start his day or not.  Sometimes getting right up and sometimes sleeping a bit longer before getting up.  I always check to see if he is breathing in the mornings.  I know he has to go at some point, and I hope for his sake he goes peacefully in his sleep.  Having watched my mother die and my lovely doberman Jag die both painfully I pray for those I love to go in their sleep even though the shock would be harder for me to deal with.

Some of the things are larger- like watching my mother and father fight the cancer that was taking over her body.  Dad almost never left Mom during that time, he drove her everywhere.  She wanted to continue working, he would drive her to work, wait til she was done working and drive her home.  While fighting she finished up her Masters Degree.  She walked proudly across stage in her cap and gown!  It was wonderful!  Mom looked great in hats, they  went on a trip early on, while on the trip they found a hat shop, they bought several hats for her to wear instead of a wig.  She looked great with a bald head, and absolutely adorable when she donned a hat!  She knew when to fight the fight and she knew when to just live her life.  My Dad showed me the value of loyalty, love, and true devotion.

 

I am inspired by a husband who works a 56 hour work week at his regular job, picks up between 4-24 hours of extra work a week, and still does things around the house, runs errands, volunteers for local emergency services ( which is where he is tonight ), helps neighbors, and drives me to appointments each week.  My hero, and my inspiration to work hard to be the best me I can be!

I am inspired by a friend who is making the most of living a life with the different abilities that spina-bifida presents.  He is my age and has been in a wheel chair since I have known him, he has lived in a nursing home for a while now, and is now making heads spin, as he chairs the residence council and is making a positive impact in the lives of the other residents by affecting policies.  He has even attracted the attention of a certain older (no not that much older) person and is now dating.  I was blessed to have had some time to spend with him recently he is focused on the good things!  I just love that!

I am inspired by a woman who sewed her own clothes for her family even her bra’s, who took advantage of an opportunity to make herself look and feel better and was so grateful for what it did for her she shared the same stuff with others!   She not only shared Mary Kay with women who eventually shared it with me, she personally shared with me how I could get my vitamins and loose weight as well.  I am so grateful to her, for not keeping these great things to herself.   Because she decided to share and didn’t keep these things a secret, my skin looks so great, and now so does my body!  And so does the skin of many more women because I decided to share, and the bodies of those I’ve started sharing with are looking and feeling better too! 

I am inspired by people who follow through on what they say they will do.  The people that follow through.  They do their best, they don’t compromise integrity, they strive to do their personal best.  Show people they are valued, show them they are worthy, talk is cheap actions are where the true value is shown. 

I have so many more people in my life who inspire me.  I will try and write about more of them soon.

My cousin J and her family of 5

My friends B&J

My many friends who work for non profit and social service type jobs, not to mention those in the military.

My Sisters and Brothers in Law and their kids

The friends I know who volunteer in so many areas

My former unit members who are strong survivors

My grandmothers

 

Gosh, my list keeps on going… I guess I have even more to write about than I have mentioned but it is time to go.  My hubby is home and needs some zzzzz’s!

Blessings,

DiReCtiOnS pLeAsE!

When you have a moment in your day, what do you find you most want to do with it. 

I remember my time before, I never slowed down.  If I wasn’t working I was thinking about working.  I was thinking about how to be more effective, or ways to change, or stay consistent to give things time to flourish. 

If I would have a spare moment, I would spend it learning something new that would help not only me, but help my gals to do better so that they could change their lives.

I know now that what I did was impactful.  I see it in the lives of the women who I served. 

On my visit back to where I grew up, I was able to spend some time with several of my gals.  Each of them has grown, I see the skills that I worked to develop in them coming to fruition.  It is so wonderful to see.

I was never about the money, I was always about the development of the people I was serving.  It is so rewarding to see that change having taken place or still continuing to take place.

I liked watching the money too, but having come from where I came from, having gone through all that I had, it took me quite a long time to get myself strong enough to stand up and get things going for myself.

I see that again in myself.  With each day being not only an emotional struggle, as well as a physical one, I am still finding that the direction I am headed is cloudy. 

Before things for me were so clear.  Where I was going, what I wanted, where I would end up had become second nature to me.  I had thought about it, planned for it, worked toward it, and persisted through all of the hell that one has to go through to break through.  I knew in my heart my goals, dreams and aspirations.  My direction was solid and I was focused.

Now having been derailed, I find myself lost.  Flitting to this flitting to that, I know my mind is on getting well.  But that seems to be so ambiguous.  What is that?  What can I aspire to in that area?  What constitutes when I am as good as I can get?  I don’t know and neither does anyone else.  For each improvement, I seem to run in to a set back.  I was walking and riding the recumbent bike for longer than I had YEA!  But this morning I fell again, I was half asleep and I fell.  It is maddening. 

In fact I was so tired, I didn’t realize that I had actually fallen until I found my dirty clothes in a pile in the other room.  I thought I had dreamt it.  I wondered about telling Jason, felt guilty I hadn’t told him earlier, but I’ve been in a fog all day.  I’ve been having difficulty getting going this day.  Things are clicking along well now.  I am just tired.  But it is frustrating!

I just don’t seem to be getting strong enough fast enough for my liking.  I want to work, I want to do some thing to contribute.  I don’t know what that is.  I am trying to do a few different things.  I like doing them but they each present different obstacles. 

Ahhh, the joy of starting over.  Someday I will have a clear direction for myself.  There is a plan for me I am sure.  I am just not sure which path to follow.  I hope there are some illuminations. 

I did take a few pictures today.  I will add them later.  I am not in the right frame of mind to be able to download them correctly and then get them in good enough shape to post.

I am going to try to get my veggies gone through tomorrow.  Of course tomorrow is when they finish off my root canal.  That should be fun…. another day long visit to the dentist.  Oh, happy day!

Blessings!

MaDe iT…

The best and the worst… Well that’s how it goes.  I’ve been running low on my Isagenix things.  So I’ve been personally cutting back for a few weeks now.  Sometimes none of it in a day, and sometimes a shake or something.  Good news my size and weight have remained the same.  Bad news I am exhausted have gotten a cold that won’t seem to go away.  :(!

I have been eating what ever is around.  I have been quite successful in eating all of the things in the cupboards.  Which is nice, I think those things can sometimes sit for years if you don’t go through them. 

Jason traveled this past week for two classes, one trip I missed going on with him.  The second trip he dropped me off at my G-Ma’s old home while he traveled on to his class.  I am glad he dropped me off, I had lots of plans, while the first 3 days I was feeling so miserable I couldn’t go hang out as planned.  I did make it to see my sister a bit.  But I sure wasn’t much fun.  My dad was back and drove me around and fed me.  :)  When Jason got back he would take him out for breakfast in the mornings!  I slept.  The week was a rough one but got a bit better toward the end and I was able to get out and around to see my friends and family some.

Jason even was gracious enough to agree to stick around an extra day.  Which made it possible to see my niece play ball, see another classmate and great friend, and hang out with family and watch a great game! 

I got to do see more friends as well, I even got my hair cut!  In an actual style!  My friend who has a wonderful salon, cut my hair.  I washed it before I got there.  I can’t stick my head in those sinks.  It is super cute!  Thanks so much Robyn! 

I came home with lots and lots of new veggies… my garden just wasn’t that successful this year.  I am not sure why, I may have gotten everything planted way to late, especially since this year never did really warm up.  But my cousin sent me home with loads of things!  She even made salsa’s and other canned things that she shared! 

While Dad and Jason were out and about he found a pile of eggplant that needed a new home, so Jason and I went back to get it.  My friend Jen is wanting some of that.  I don’t know if they will last long enough for me to get them to her.   I love eggplant!  My mom made it so good!  I have never been able to do it but maybe someday I will figure it out.

Staying at my G-Ma’s home brings back so many memories.  I really loved growing up there.  I was so active!  I felt quite fortunate while feeling crummy I was able to still walk with Ozzie and Luka around the place.  I got to go out 2 times!  I had intended to be out much more than that, but considering how I felt I was lucky to have done what I did.

Jason sure went above and beyond yesterday, having driven us home, I slept almost all of the way.  I couldn’t move easily and while I tried to stay awake it didn’t work.  He drove back into town to get our friends dog we’d agreed to watch while she was recovering from surgery.  We didn’t have room to get her on our way home.

He was great, he really finished all that needed done, he even helped me get all of the things out of the garden!  Yea! 

I am doing better tonight after quite allot of medication.  I didn’t want to take it but I couldn’t take it any more either.  So, I hope I get a break from the pain this week.  I’ve got lots to do. 

I was able to get the dogs food cooked today, I wasn’t sure if I would be able to do it or not.  The medication kicked in long enough for me to do it!  I am so thankful, so are they!

When I was finishing the nausea started, so I had to rest at the end of finishing their meal, rest, cook, rest, cook, rest, cook.  Well!  I did it and I am happy for that.  I even ran the dishwasher!  So that is my day’s worth of deeds!  I am very happy to have accomplished them.  I had to try quite hard.

Tomorrow, I want to get the things I brought home and got from the garden taken care of.  Not to mention a list of other things!  It would be nice to get things un packed and put away as well.  I’ve got my list ready!

I will try to get some pictures taken and posted!  I think that is always more fun! 

Blessings!

FrOm HeLL ~ Thank GOD I am no longer there!

Oh my Oh my….

The last week I realized would have been much better had I taken some pain medication.  I spent the week for the most part laying in bed… not all of the time of course.  I haven’t wanted to take anything.  I have been having such horrible stomach pain when I do that it just seems like fixing one issue, and causing another. 

Seems like not taking the meds are the lesser of two evils, seeing as I am actually causing more problems for myself with on going stomach issues.  But am I?  Laying in bed itself for me is like a death sentence to some degree….  at less than forty years old I already am considered to have osteoporosis.  So not getting up and around is a big deal, I need the weight bearing exercise.. Ok so I don’t consider the little that I do really exercise but it is all I can do and do it I will.

Jason I think has probably been praying quite allot this week that what ever was happening to me would disappear.  I have been horrible.  I sleep and sleep and sleep, then I don’t sleep and don’t sleep and then I cry, or am moody, sulky, unfocused, depressed….  Not to mention I’ve gotten some sort of new allergy…. that really stinks! 

Hmm… all it took was a couple of pain medications.  I am back to new again…  I could just scream.. although, that’s what I would have spent my little energy on last week, this week I’d rather get the laundry that’s been plaguing me clean!

So if you see my awesome hubby, give him a pat on the back, he’s had a really rough couple of weeks!

On a different note… www.howcast.com  I think will be my new favorite website!  I love it!  I love to learn and I love to do things myself!  YEA!

Having been working to make pickles ever since my cousin J was here a couple of months ago… she brought me everything I needed.  I ended up having to throw away her huge bag of cucumbers she brought me.  GRRRRR!!!!

Just not having enough energy to do it was so difficult, I hated myself for wasting all of those cucumbers.  Pickles cost lots of $$$  so do more cucumbers to replace the ones that I tossed.  Not to mention the guilt of not getting something so simple done. 

Tonight I finally did get the pickles done.  I was just going to do one set of them not both packets, but decided to push it.  Needed to as who knows when I could do it again.  I didn’t go to therapy today, not sure I want to drive Dad’s huge truck that is sitting in the drive way.  He’s got his car..  It isn’t that I am not capable.. but geesh the energy it takes!

I think my day was well spent.  I’ve been working on the laundry, our bed needed clean sheets badly!  Haven’t been able to get that done for WAAAAAAAY to long!  Happy tonight I should be sleeping on clean sheets.  Of course that means I have to get them all put back on the bed.  Otherwise I might just go sleep in the guest bedroom where the sheets still have yet to be changed from my father staying over days ago!  Oh well. 

Now for a distraction!  MMMMmmmMM homemade Jelly from MaryBelle!  THANKS MaryBelle!  It is soooo so good!

I wasn’t supposed to be here anyway.  I was supposed to be  with Jason while he is out on one of his teaching jobs.  We had it planned, I was even going to spend time with some friends.  Oh well.  Such is Life!   I it was on one of my horrible days that he left, later that night I relinquished my judgment and took the medication. 

I don’t want to take it also because it costs money to get more.  I need to go get more of it, as it is sitting down at the pharmacy waiting for me.  But I don’t want to pay for it.  If I pay for medication it will mean I can’t get much food, if I don’t well…  Yes I am cheap!  I’ve got to be!  I prefer to think of it as smart for the wallet so we can make it through the month with out begging for help!

And we are making it!  It ain’t pretty but we are doing it!  I am super proud of that!  Our bills are even being paid on time!  I love that even more!  Stick to the plan sister!

I wish choices were a bit easier.  Is it really that bad?  I suppose we have a bit of discretionary income, not allot but some.  Next month will be better.  I already figured it out.  This month insurance premiums need to be paid!  Those are important!  So off the money will go. 

I am excited, also, I am getting things figured out about how to take pictures of the clothes that I have to sell to others.  I want to take nice pictures so the details will show through.  I also need to get my stamps.com account fixed.  That is driving me nutty also! 

So look forward to seeing some great things you might like being posted soon.

I should have taken pictures of my pickle project.  I just really wanted to get them done.  I will however take pictures of the pickles.  I just did refrigerator pickles, not the completely canned kind.  That would have taken more effort.  I will give some to my neighbors as they need to be eaten soon.  Besides how many pickles are actually healthy to eat? 

I might even send a jar with Jason to work.  I hope I get my jars back but hey, I guess a gift is a gift.  I need to save some more sauce jars anyway.  Yet another recycling project.

Speaking of recycling….

Here is the list of things I am using or giving to someone who will use them.

Clothing all sizes all conditions Love the really nice stuff, but will use the ripped and stained stuff too!

zucchini even bruised is good

Toilet Paper Rolls and Paper Towel Rolls

Buttons

Sewing Notions – Can even be OLD!

Jewelry, can be broken or old also

children’s socks

Baby Jars – Small Jars – Canning Jars

Wood – All types All sizes for the most part, no

perennials

Felt

Plant Pots

Red Bricks

Paint all types

Brushes all types

Baskets

I am sure there are more things I or my friends are recycling… but hey it is a start. 

So this week, I plan on making the next teaching trip with Jason.  I also plan on finishing up a resume I am working on for Kirby, and a newsletter template that I am doing for Kristi. 

I am also super excited about my Isagenix!  I have really been learning quite allot!  I have heard some of the best stories!  I just love it!  I can’t wait to hear  some more!  I also found out that my aunt and uncle are using it too!  That is pretty cool! 

Time to go check my bedding!  I sure hope it dry’s quick!

Blessings! 

 

***Ok so I don’t plan on turning our house into a junk yard.. but I do plan on using these things or sharing them with folks who will!  I am quite excited about recycling!  I also recycle little boxes to ship my MK products to my clients in.  My clients are so awesome!  Thanks Kristi, Kara, Susan, Christina, and Heather!

SiMpLe pOsT

So I just found another great blog! I love, I mean really love finding great new blogs for me to explore. It really helps me feel like I am connecting with people when all I am able to do some days is read blogs and check out facebook. So here is a really cool artist check out her blog!

The link here will take you to her give away page that is going on right now:

GinaLeeKim Cool Blog!

I found her blog through another I follow:

Kelly at Happy Shack!

I will leave this post at that as my day wasn’t that memorable as I needed to sleep most of it and my night is going horribly… I will keep that to myself. I just need something to go right, we really just need something to go right. It is getting so hard.

Sometimes I have a hard time finding my way through the trees.

Go Go Go Go Go Go…

Exciting things!  I’ve got ideas galore!  I am thrilled with them.  I was even able to put one idea in to action with a wedding gift for my cousin this weekend.  I must say it was much harder to do than I remembered.  But I could do it none the less.  I also enjoyed doing it. 

My cousin also got something made just for her by me.  That is worth it too I think.  I love things that other’s have made.  I know that everyone doesn’t like to make things.  That is great too!  Someone has always made something it doesn’t have to be made by ….. for something to be considered special or important.  I didn’t take a picture but it sure was fun.

So now I’ve got to get busy figuring out what other things I can do.  I am quite excited. 

Being able to drive to therapy yesterday Wooo Hoo!  Feeling better afterwards as is usually the case I am always needing something fixed, as I keep pushing myself to get stronger and more stable, things slip out of functioning position causing problems that stop me in my tracks.  My therapies are a blessing so I can keep improving.  I know more things would help, but I can’t afford to do it all.  Someday I hope to add those things in as well.

So after therapy I was able to run a few errands.  I picked up my friend who is 72 and has Macular Degeneration and we ran our errands together.  While I wasn’t able to finish the things on my list to get done.  I feel quite successful!  It had been a while since I was out on my own doing some things.  I had to head home to rest.  My energy from dealing with the pain had started to deplete… get home quick to rest.  Otherwise I’d have had to stay with her until evening maybe even over night, and I had to be home for Oz.. so off we went.  I got home and rested the entire night.  I felt successful!

I’ve been frustrated, I either have allergies, or a cold.  Not sure which.  I have never felt quite like this before, frustrating.  I would like to sleep at night.  I would love to breathe at night.  Things during the day are much better but still a little uncomfortable.  Hmmm… I may end up going to the Dr. to figure these things out.  I hope not.

I am currently listening to an Isagenix call.  I keep being motivated by all of the stories from friends and new friends how they are all loosing weight, being on less and less medications, and getting healthier test results!  YiPee!!  This is so fun! 

While I am not working to loose any more weight, I am working to gain muscles!  So, I’ve got to get to my PT for the rest of the week.  The fall last week has taken some recovery time.  But I am doing better and better.  I can’t wait to get on the treadmill more! 

Maybe Jason will figure out how to make the one that we got off of craigslist work one of these days…

I am so excited!  I am going to measure myself and get Jason measured so we can know our 4 week results.

We’ll gotta go, I’ve got things I want to work on today! 

Blessings!