Tuesday, November 3, 2009

AmAziNg GrAcE

As I seem to have taken another break from posting.  I have actually been trying to write, but the last few things I have managed to get out of my head, were just not appropriate to share. 

I was informed last night before Jason fell to sleep that I hadn’t been doing my part about keeping him informed about what was going on with me.  He pointed out that my last post was well, a while ago. 

Things have actually been going pretty well.  I have noticed an improvement in how my neck has been feeling.  One day a few weeks ago while at my Massage Therapy appointment, I noticed a marked improvement.   I hadn’t really told anyone about it as I didn’t know how long it would last.  I still seem to be feeling better from it.  While not perfect, the daily pain is still here, but it isn’t quite as bad.  Something changed during that appointment.  I am not sure what.  But it made a significant difference.  Things just haven’t been as severe pain wise. 

I am so happy for that.  But with my decrease in neck pain, I have increased my activity some.  Ok, so it isn’t much, because I still FEEL my neck pain significantly.  But I am not holding my head as much when I bend over!  That means I can have two hands!  YEA! 

Hey people that is a big deal!  Yes, on the days where the migraine’s are present, I am holding my head.  My migraines are not quite as bad now either!  That is another thing I noticed.  Woot!  Woot!  I am using less medication to get rid of them!  I will take it! 

I couldn’t drive today, the pain is to bad to be behind the wheel of the car.  But I am resting then typing then resting then typing resting and typing!  I am typing this, and I am also working on a man’s resume.  He really needs my help, and I feel good helping him.  I don’t know that I could do this regularly, as it does take quite allot out of me doing it, but I do feel good about it.  But you never know!  I could do one a month or so maybe!  It is nice to help people who couldn’t afford a professional!  I am free, and not a pro!  I was just taught these skills from helping my mother critique them, she was a pro at it.

So, I’ve been doing more!  And loving it.  This has it’s own challenges as well.  I had gotten to where I was doing more at Physical Therapy as well.. I haven’t been able to go for a while now, due to Jason’s schedule, and me not being able to drive on certain days like today. 

But tomorrow I will make it.  Jason will be driving me!  Woot!  I’ve had problems with my joints shifting out of where they should be.  My right side is by far the worst at it, but the left side shifts around as well. 

I usually don’t notice much pain except for just the regular daily pain that I have in my joints.  When my arm unsuctions from my shoulder then goes back in that is un nerving to say the least.  Besides being gross!  Then it also hurts on top of it, which is oh so fun!

But on Saturday we were out celebrating!  Which I love because it was the first time in YEARS that we actually got to go out for our Anniversary!  We went out with friends!  It was wonderful!  Jason’s froggy voice and all.  I wasn’t sure if we were going to be going.  I wasn’t holding us up this year he had come home from his major days of working 24/7 for multiple days in a row with out his voice!  Gotta love that.  He napped all afternoon!  The man who can’t nap fell asleep on our anniversary!  I made cookies!

We attended an Open House!  It was wonderful!  I will share more about the place we went later.  As the plan is for me to go back this week!  Our friends had friends, who have a pottery studio!  They sell their pottery at several galleries!  That is so cool!  I had RSVP’d and so I got to paint a couple of their pots to take home!  I had so much fun!

Sitting their painting my pots, I had an unfortunate incident.  Which once again makes me so glad that I had Luka with me!  He came right in the pottery shop with me and hung out!  They even gave me a chair to use so I could sit and paint, everyone else did their standing.  But while sitting on my nice chair… my right leg slipped out of it’s socket in my hip when I shifted my leg to turn a different direction.  OMG PAIN PAIN PAIN,,, Holly Cats Pain!  I didn’t know if I was going to be able to get it slipped back in or not.  It just was seeming to stick out of joint this time.  I just remember thinking stay calm stay calm relax relax relax breathe breathe, Oh my, Jason is going to be so mad!  Just sit here, relax relax relax…   Ok now try again move slow…  breathe breathe…  Oh my it hurts it hurts….  this isn’t good…. 

As I wiggled my leg, then lifted my leg with my hands, then moved my hip, it went back in.  OMG@@@@@@!!!!!%%%!!*****   Well.. You get the picture!  It hurt almost as bad as when I broke my arm in 1/2 and worse then when I had burnt myself in the oven the week before.  I think it only hurt less than breaking my arm as it was a short amount of time. 

After this little incident I couldn’t walk on my own at all.  Which is always so lovely!  Luka was a fabulous help!  He knew I was hurting and did just great.  By the end of the evening I was doing better the pain level I was in had dropped significantly and it was easier to get around.  I didn’t take any chances Luka had been put to sleep in the Jeep, it was way past his bed time my old guy was tired!  So Jason stuck to me like glue after that!  Yea! 

I was able to finish my pottery painting, I hung out with our friends, and made bunches of new ones as well!  It was such a nice evening and everyone there was real and regular!  I loved it, it was the type of environment that Jason is comfortable in so I had a great time knowing he was doing well there too! 

As it turned out, my pottery pieces turned out wonderfully!  Raku Pottery is what we did!  I will put pictures here of what I did!  The DeDe the gal who’s studio was asked if I would paint up some more for her so she could sell them! 

Of course!  I would love to do that!  I was just thrilled to be back in a pottery studio!  The last time I was I think was either at the University or in my Kozzi’s art room at her college both were prior to my marriage.  Which has now been 11 years!  Yipee!

My friend Wendy and I are headed back there.  I wonder what we will do this time?   DeDe shared that she thinks she can help me to throw pots too!  That is something that I have never been good at.  She has a wheel that is tall that I wouldn’t have to bend over to use.  Gotta dig out some old warm clothes for this adventure!  I have a feeling if I start throwing I am going to be a M E S S!  I always had done slab work.   I thought I’d never be able to do it again but they have all of the tools at their studio that make it easier!  With multiple people there as well, I can ask for help!  So this might just work out wonderfully, we’ll see!

I was going to be an art teacher after all when I was enrolled in college. 

Jason went back to work on Sunday and I rested after my long day on Saturday.  Monday was like that too, I tried to do some things, I managed to get the kitchen cleaned up from making dog food on Friday night.  Thank goodness for my friend Carolyn who came over and helped me with that. 

I was so happy I could get groceries on Thursday!  But by the time I got home I was too tired to haul them in.  It was cold that night thank goodness, so I just left everything in the car.  The next evening I went out to get the things.  I got them in as I needed to make dog food.  I couldn’t do it on my own.  So I called Carolyn!  She is a blessing.  I hadn’t called anyone for help most people are so busy, they’d help if they could or if it would be an emergency, but aren’t available in general spur of the moment.  Thank goodness Carolyn was.  She was going to help me again this week, to finish cooking and freezing the squash.  But I don’t think I am going to get that done this week.  I already have to many things pending.  Thankfully we got enough squash cut up and potato’s cooked for the next batch of food.  So things will be fine until I can get the next cut and cooked.

So Luka’s new diet which has stopped his chewing of his feet is working well.  The all over swelling of his body and the hot spots that would crop up on him all over has disappeared for the most part too.  But it is taking a toll on me and our budget.  So I am also researching some other ideas to include as well.  

He is allergic to all birds, all grains, and milk!  YIKES!

His food now is

Deer meat ( have extra you don’t want send it our direction) 

Canned Salmon- Which I am right now as I type this just watching on the ABC Nightly News probably has BPA in it and it was shown to cause harm in animals.  GEESH!  They are also concerned about it for people too!.. OMG!  WHERE IS THERE SAFE FOOD!  I am now going to look for FROZEN…. GRRRRR!  Canned foods will be leaving my cupboard for sure!  I don’t need any extra help in feeling crummy! 

Squash – All types ( right now that is what is in season)

Potatoes- Yea!  Those are affordable!

Pumpkin- Yup I am cutting those up too!


Olive or Canola Oil- Depending on price

Ground Flax Seed

I’ve also been putting my Isagenix Shake and protein in his food each day too.  Making sure he gets enough protein, and vitamins. 

I have been researching other foods as well.  Dick Van Patton makes a food that might work into his plan!  So that is on my list of things to get and try for him as well!  The last food that was a two ingredient food did help with the allergies, but it was hard to get I need a prescription, and besides being expensive he was lethargic on it and that just won’t do!

Now back to the other night!  Because one of the most amazing things that happened is that a friend of our friends who also attended the party, Jennifer, she is a Physical Therapist who specializes in Migraines, as well as new technology!  She shared that she wanted to help me, she wants to take me on as her special project!  Oh My!  What a wonderful end to a great evening!  I’ve been reading up on the technology she has access to!  I am so excited!  It sounds perfect for me!  (not that I am a Dr.) She shared that she thinks that I would be a perfect candidate.  She also shared that when she saw me she thought I had MS.  I suppose I do look like I have something like that.  I will have to do the research as to the similarities.  AS I know I don’t have that but I wonder if things that help the people with that would help me too?  Hmm..

I have to say that when she started sharing with me about what she does and where she worked, I was like yeah yeah yeah… I’ll just listen to her and then go back to painting away.  But I actually did listen to her.  The more she shared the more she intrigued me.  I found myself still wanting to shut the ideas she was sharing out of my head.  I consciously had to remind myself once again, that you never know where the miracle is going to come from.  God has a plan!  It is not my plan it is his.  I need to be open to ALL opportunities even if they come in unexpected packaging.  So I am taking another step in faith…  Just like a year ago with the Isagenix which has been a miracle for me.  I just follow the plan and do what I am told under no circumstances will I give up, and if I fall off I get back on and go at it with all I’ve got!  I don’t plan on being like this forever, I have no intention of getting worse and having to stay in bed again!

Jennifer!  I am ready!  Let’s go! 


I feel pretty good about all that I’ve been doing! 

1. Thanks to Massage Therapy Increased Activity and Less Neck Pain

2. Thanks to Physical Therapy adjusting my hip (yes the same one that gave me trouble on Halloween)  I can move without pain much easier and I am getting STRONGER! 

3. Luka is doing better and is a better Service Dog for me as a result!

4.  I have written 2 resume’s for people already this year and am working on my third

5.  I have an opportunity to make pottery!

6.  I have great friends who are so supportive, which means the world to us!

7.  Awesome Dr’s and Therapists

8.  Keeping an open mind about people and things in my path.

9.  Getting things I’ve promised done done.  While they aren’t many I am following through.

10.  I’ve lost 55 pounds which has made a huge difference in how I can get around.  It makes it so much easier on Jason when I need carried as well. 

11.  Driving, I am doing more and more.

12.  Walking I am doing more and more!

13.  Emotionally I am hanging in there, and so is Jason!  Phew, it has been so tough!

14.  For the most part I have also managed to stay out of the ER except for a few falls!  That is a marked improvement as well!

15.  I am learning more and more about being healthier, which I had never been consumed by before.  I am more educated than ever, although my mom had done a pretty good job with me.  (Like I haven’t drank soda for almost 10 years except for a few sips every now and then when nothing else was around.) 

16.  Our bills are paid on time!  We are getting things paid off like the bed we got!  Before we invest in other things!  One thing at a time!  Cash is king baby!  Thanks to my money making hubby!  You rock, we are doing it!

17.  I have begun helping others feel better with my Isagenix!  I am so grateful for that!  If you want to know more about it too, let me know!  Send me an email at shine.shimmer.sparkle@gmail.com   I will share some information with you.  I feel guilty not helping others.  Even just for the vitamin aspect of it it is worth it, I feel so much better since the first week I was taking it!  I never want to stop!

18.  I’ve been managing my PTSD better since Luka has become my Service Dog.  Still got a ways to go, but I am thinking about sticking myself back into treatment for it.  (The last day I had an appointment for my PTSD was on the day of my accident, it was a really great day up to the crash I was looking forward to my appointment, I had really begun to make some great progress!)  I’d been putting off going back because multiple health care appointments in a week/day focused on my physical health has been about all I can handle.  Dealing with the issues that are behind my PTSD are a whole new ball game of exertion.  Staying as happy as possible has been my other focus, can’t go back down the deep depression path!  Digging into my past didn’t fall into the “happy” category, not sure it does now either.  It is just another thing that needs to be done.  Of course that is another bill that will be landing on our doorstep.  Need to weigh the costs of that as well.

19.  My dental plan is on track fixing the teeth wrecked by having those fentanol lolly pops in my mouth for years.  So far 2 finished crowns, 1 root canal and a pending crown with I think at least 3 more to go!  Geesh, that comes with its own price tag.  Better than having no teeth!  Jason is on this track as well too!  Getting his whites all pearly!  As much as we both just LOVE sitting in the dentist chair!  We go to a local college and let the student’s practice on us so we can more easily justify having teeth!  Which is painstaking, literally and figuratively!

20.  I still hurt pretty much everywhere, but I can now hold my head up, I can walk more than a few blocks, I can do things and rest then do things and rest and do things and rest!  Point being I can do things!  I am still married to the greatest guy ever!  Who sticks to me like glue even when he might not really want to!  I am not stuck in my bed, or house anymore!  (ok so the ice isn’t hear yet- don’t plan on walking on that stuff!)  I am skinny and can wear pretty much anything which in itself is fun!  Good Will and consignment shops are still my favorite places to shop!  Even though I love designer clothes ( Amazing things can be found there! Things that you can actually afford! )  I have a great old Service Dog! 


I miss the life I had that is for sure!  I am starting to like the one that is unfolding before me.  That in it’s self is a blessing! 

Life is full of beauty even if all you can do is watch it out your bedroom window!  I should know!

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