Thursday, October 22, 2009

Oh My oH mY!

Things to do places to go.  I can’t seem to ever get caught up.  I’ve had to miss therapy for a while now.  I know that I will be worse for it.  I am doing what I can on my own.  Unfortunately for many things I still need supervision… DRAT! 

Oh, well.  That’s just the nature of the beast lately.  Today has been spent going through the stack of papers and things I need to get done regarding the papers.  It is 7 pm and I still haven’t even had the time to write out the bills.  But I am knocking off things one by one. 

Writing this is hardly a necessity, but it makes me feel better to do it.  Getting stuff out of my head is sure a big help for me.   I’ve got quite allot left to do.

But I can’t help but feel starting new things when I have yet to complete things that are started but unfinished is wrong.

I’ve been planning to get a box of goodies sent to the Kyle’s in Iraq.  I thought we’d find some magazines and things like that to send, but Jason didn’t know what they’d like.  So I am filling the boxes up with cookies. 

At the moment I think both of them have cookies to spare!  But another box is never a bad thing!  They can make some friends by sharing!

My niece made some spritz!  Jason made brownies, and I ma making my favorite MoNsTeR CoOkiEs, thankfully while on my grocery adventure the other day, I talked to a lady in the cookie isle.  She shared with me about how she found a great monster cookie recipe that was simple and easy.  That’s what I’ve needed.  All of this measuring mega stirring and all wears this girl out!  So I thought I’d give it a try too!  She said to grab two cookie mix bags then go to the site above and I’d find the recipe! 

I love it!  They were the simplest MONSTOR COOKIES I have ever made!  I used to make them allot!  It was much more difficult than this too!

Ok, I also added for my goodies, some granola instead of quick oats, a packet of breakfast oatmeal, 1/4 cup coconut, some peanuts, mini M&M’s, fancy chocolate chips, and Heath BITS!  MMMmmmmMMMMM   My house smells wonderful! 

I am going to freeze the cookies tonight!  Most are already in the deep freezer already!  Then I will pack them up tomorrow and ship them all off to Iraq, and pray they arrive safely to the guys!  I am including a note to in case someone has allergies… since peanuts and coconut are included. 

Ok it is testing time!  I get to taste test the “losers”  the “winners” go in the freezer!  I am washing them down with my Isagenix vanilla shake!  MMMMMMmmmmMM!

What a horrible job!  Hee Hee!!

Ok so I’ve taken some pictures, I will get them added later way to tired at the moment, I have yet to pack as well…

I have accomplished –Most- of my list.  So that is one good thing. 


Tuesday, October 20, 2009

gReAt dAy!

Ok so what a great day today was!  As of late I am groggy waking up.  Don’t know what’s going on there.  Some days I am wide awake other days I am in a stupor for half of the day.  I am thankful that I had washed my hair the day before. 

I think that is about all I got accomplished yesterday, but hey, it’s all good!  Oh Oh!!  Yesterday I finally finished unpacking my bag from my trip to Grandma’s house.  Today I realized that I need to start packing it again tomorrow for our next trip.  Yikes!  Jason’s back to work at the hospital and we get to see our friends!  Woot!  I’ve got two days to get lots of gals called! 

So today, it was a beautiful day!  It was warm outside it wasn’t windy at all!  It was sunny and wonderful!  I made it out about 2:00 pm I sat outside and did my exercises outside. 


Getting started doing my ab breathing exercises,

Adding in the football!  I always wanted one of these, although I never thought this is what I would use this for.


The boys and girl enjoyed it too!   I didn’t get pictures of everyone, just Luka… the natives got restless and I had to put them back inside before I had my phone in my hands to take pictures. 


Luka hanging out in case I need some help.  Yes, he wears a pinch collar.  I know, it looks horrible.  He begs to wear it.  We’ve had to use this as somewhere along his life path, he lived with a cat, didn’t mind the cat.  Then somehow some where later, he was told it was alright to chase the cat and try to eat the cat.  So now he wears the lovely pinch collar, so I don’t get drug down the street when he sees a cat! 

Yea, he’s 110 lbs I am 120…. I don’t stand a chance except for this collar, and after more than a year he listens to me much better now, isn’t likely to try to drag me down the street, although he does still sometimes get so excited that he finds it very difficult to stay still.  Other than that we get along perfectly!  So we’ll keep working on the cat issue!

Luka’s only other issue is he loves little dogs!  All dogs really but the little ones for sure!  Crazy!  But he is doing so much better than before!  He does manage to do his job quite well!

Well enough in fact that today I was asked if kids could be trained to behave as good as he does.  I said I am sure they could, wink!  She said, I am just to busy for all that, do you train them?  …… time to walk away!!!   Yikes! 

So today Luka and I after our backyard adventure we made a trip to the bank Melanie, Deb, and the other gals were very cheerful today, then to the post office Brian was there!  Yea!  We sure miss having Brian at our post office!  The new gal Kim is nice too! 

We walked from store to store!  It was so great!  A nice day and I was feeling well to boot!  Yipee! 

The new clothing store was closed, boo!  But the gifty store was open of course, Mary was even there for a bit!  Pretty fun, the last time I’d seen her was at my friends funeral.  We sat together.  She was of course amazed at Luka’s stellar behavior!  They had the cutest hats in!  Not my size they were for babies, but maybe I can figure out how to make one for me!

Speaking of hats!  One of my most favorite blogs has their new shopping site up and running.  It isn’t perfect yet but it is almost there!  Check it out!  She makes hat’s and purses and sells patterns so you can make them yourself too!  Another one of the Australian Bloggers I love!  Her blog is wonderful as well!  BLOG!  I look forward to seeing all of the great things she comes up with! 

My journey continued today, since I was doing so well, I didn’t want to go home, it was about 5 or so now, and I was remembering a conversation I had before I hung out in my backyard?  My neighbor came by, shared that she was off to visit her hubby at the nursing home.  So I thought to myself, it’s been a long time since I’d gone down to visit him as well.  I’ve got the time and I don’t want to go home, Luka and I are doing well, and he had yet to go to the nursing home! 

I think they get therapy dogs in there!  The residents didn’t freak out at all!  But the sure did reach out and try to pet him.  YIKES!  Couldn’t let that happen!  To much commotion!  Can’t get him all excited now…  Gotta go see my neighbor, so we moved ourselves along a little quicker.  We sat in a high back chair for a while with him.  He’s almost blind, dumb macular degeneration!  Two of our friends have that!  (Onyx’s Momma has it too)  We stayed until he went to supper.  It was nice to get caught up!  Thank goodness for the high backed chair that I could curl up in! 

After that, I remembered that the dog food would run out tomorrow… and for our next trip I needed to have a bunch of it ready to go.  The allergies have for the most part dissipated.  Luka is having less and less hot spots and so I know we are on the right track.  I am still hoping to find a dry dog food that works for him too, but for now having to cook his food takes forever!  It however is good exercise for me I am sure!  10 lbs of potatoes takes some doing!  I have very sore arms when I stir those and standing while they cook well let’s just say after I do this I am resting!

He is also looking better too!  I add some of my Isagenix to his food as well.  It seems to be working!  So well in fact that Jason suggested that Ozzie be switched to the same stuff to see if he will add some pounds!  So far so good!  I don’t have a specific recipe but I just follow the foods that our vet suggested.

Luka has not had to wear booties for several weeks!  I am so grateful, as winter is coming and the snow, and water, mud, ice, etc. is rough on sock wearing!  Not to mention no one wants soggy socks squishing all over the floor. 

Yipee!  So we went to the grocery store after visiting the nursing home.  We talked to everyone in the store I swear!  Since we don’t get out much he and I are quite the novelty.  Even people who know me from before wonder what is going on.  Since I haven’t seen most of them for years. 

I may not have met many of them or then again I met so many people, that all over the county in which I live people at least know my name.  Weird and Cool!  I think more people know me here than where I grew up.  That is strange too, as I think I was in the newspaper every other week for something while in high school. 

Having gone back there a couple weeks ago, I remember how I can’t go anywhere without knowing someone!  Weird too as I’ve been gone over 20 something years!  It does give me a good feeling as I really like almost everyone I have ever met. 

So at the store, I was thrilled to see the laundry detergent on sale!  We stock up when this happens!  I would have bought more, but I don’t want to put us in the poor house, oh, wait, we are already there, hee hee!!!  WINK!

I also managed to get a good deal on fabric softener too!  I love it!  It felt good to do that.  I also found some brownies and met a gal in the store who shared with me how to make monster cookies quickly!  I can’t wait!  Boys in Iraq you are going to each get a box stuffed full of goodies!  Can’t figure what else to send to you besides food!  GRIN!

After I checked out a different neighbor came in to shop, we chatted for a while, that was nice, he’d been out mowing his lawn all afternoon.  Luka just laid there and waited watching all of the people come in and out of the store.  He is quite the topic of conversation… I find if I look people in the eye it gives them a lead in to ask all sorts of things.  so this is where the comment at the beginning of my post today fits in…

If I keep my eyes diverted I get away with less conversation.  Which has been most of my trips.  Today was different, I was doing so well today, I had the energy to talk to people.  So I could walk with my head up, taking my time to answer questions and talk to people.  I don’t mind this for sure, provided I have the energy to do it.  In fact I really do like the interaction.  That is one of the things that I miss the most.  I used to meet and talk to people everywhere!

Most day’s I am on a time crunch till my body starts wearing down and giving me fits.  When the pain becomes to great, my groceries will be left in the car to spoil, and so since I’ve spent Jason’s hard earned $$ on it I make sure to keep focused on getting home and things put away!

It was a fun day!  Be sure to check out my other blog!  The rescue is REALLY REALLY needing more people to step up and foster a dog!  I am sure that ours isn’t the only one overflowing either!  I know that the one my friend volunteers with is always looking too! 

Tomorrow will be another busy day!  That’s the plan anyway!


Sunday, October 18, 2009

Adopt A Dobe Little Libby Needs A Home!

sLeEpY, ShOeS, SpArKLiNg LuKa!

Oh the sweet sweet dreams I hope to be having soon.  I am not sure what’s going on with me, I seem to go through stages like this. 

My whole body is exhausted.  I can’t hardly stay awake.  My limbs are heavy and my mind wants to turn off.  Which is a rare thing for me.  I am either very cold or quite warm, weird also, as the only time I usually get warm is when I am ill.  Of course that could be the case as well but I can’t tell.  No news there.  The last infection the Dr. found with me I must have had for months because I was really sick!  Didn’t talk much about that here, but it was pretty freaky how badly infected I was (not contagious ) It took two rounds of antibiotics very strong ones to clear, I am still not sure it is gone, I probably need to go get tested again but YUCK!  I don’t want to go back to the Dr.

I’ve also got to get this choking problem I’ve got checked out.  It is getting scary for me.  Ahhh, but as Jason shares most times I am choking, don’t worry you’ll pass out soon and then you’ll be fine.  Assuming of course that I have choked on something liquid. 

Lovely, that just gives you the idea of the type of compassion I’ve got here!  I know I know, I married a man who became a firefighter.  Patch ‘em up and Move them on.  This dealing with stuff long term is something that his manual doesn’t cover.

I started moving the clothes around in my closet today, the summer things to the back and the longer sleeved things to the front. 

I am not very excited about these clothes but hey, I will deal.  I’ve got some fun vintage coats to wear this winter.  The only drawback for me is that they are heavy.  But hopefully that also will mean that I will get some stronger muscles built up hauling them around.

Speaking of muscles, I am back to wearing my Doc Martins!  I love my steel toed shoes.  I have had them for YEARS!  I got them while visiting my sis in Arizona one year.  They are so old, but you’d never know it, they’ve worn the best of any shoes I’ve ever had, and I never treat them nicely!  I bought them at a chicken store.  So they were already having issues, but I didn’t care.  Even when I had more $$ to spend I didn’t like paying full price! 

I really feel like I got a deal with them!  They weigh about 4 – 5 pounds each I swear!  So I can really get some good muscles going when I wear them.

I noticed though that all of my sneakers, are the mesh type, my feet are FREEZING in them!  I need to find some leather ones that aren’t so breezy!  I have cold feet anyway and with the winter air blowing through wowie does that make them icy!

More of my shoe saga… I did manage to find this spring an 8 dollar pair or so of hiking boots from  I am really liking that store.  Of course I only get things on super clearance… but hey!  It is good stuff!  I really need to find some slip on snow type boots.  I of course love the Uggs! Talk about out of my league.  My niece has decided she wants some shoes like that too!  I found some at target at least in their add.  I don’t know what their soles are like but the $22 or something price tag sounded much more reasonable.  Although I am waiting yet to spend that amount right now too.  I did tell my sister about them in hopes that my niece would have some great new boots to use when she heads off to school!

I’d sure like to get some riding type boots too brown and black.  I have some knee length boots, unfortunately they all come with heels….  and since the no heel rule applies for me even more in the winter… well.  Those are going to have to start looking for a new home. 

There is a new consignment shop that opened up in my town.  That is pretty cool.  I might take some of my things down there.  Surely someone would like some nifty things!  I am not ready to give up all of my cool shoes, but 2 pairs of the boots I have I might be willing to part with.  My red pair I can’t part with yet!  I sure love those!  I stick them on occasionally and stomp around in them.  I will post some pictures!  I wonder if I will be able to find red boots that are flat that I love….. hmmmm… 

Speaking of pictures… I finally bit the bullet and connected my crappy phone to the computer to sync and download the pictures I had taken. 

So here’s a bit of what I’ve been storing on my phone to share!

King Luka…. Da Dat Da Da Dat Daaaa!!!  After his bath in September!


 IMAGE_525 IMAGE_558 IMAGE_607

It was a really beautiful day as you can see.  Gorgeous in the sunshine and cool in the shade!  This is the last day that I was able to spend time outside!  I am so thankful for this day!


I rested a while and then laid down a dry towel and did my therapy exercises while Luka stood guard enjoying the sunshine!


I just love how the trees looked in the sunshine!  This day was just outstanding!


Using my abs….


Upsi Daisy….  getting the abs to work and work….  Yea!


Luka attended my cousin’s wedding with me.  Here he is basking in the sunshine watching the world go by!


Ok, so I think I will share more of my pictures later.  I am also going to post some of me and my family on Facebook later so go check out my pictures there as well! 


Saturday, October 17, 2009

SpRiNt ~ BlOgS! ~ $HoPpiNG ~ My dAy

Well, as days go this one is sure to be an interesting one for me. 

Due not to outside activities or influences, but because I am still so groggy after a seemingly 48 + hours of sleep.  Interrupted of course.  But none the less a foggy business the last two days have become.  I feel as if I am embarking on the next 24 hours of fog as well.  My mind seems all shuttered.  I’ve had a migraine for sure, not sure if it is still going on, it may be and that just might be the cause of my cloudy mind. 

I feel as if many giant cotton clouds have been shoved inside of my brain.  I am not with out pain, but the fog of it all seems to be over riding many sensations.  The day is a burr… Again a late wakeup, after an early to bed the evening before.  Jeepers…  I don’t want to take more pills just to be sure, but the closeness of Luka would give thought to a migraine being present, as he is like glue.

So maybe that should be my clue.  I surely can’t be driving around anywhere today, in fact I am quite sure that this is one of those days I shouldn’t even plan on walking much around my own home.  Every thing just seems wonkey and out of sorts. 

Gotta love the days like this.  GRRRRrrrrRRR….

On another note… I don’t subscribe to any magazines, I wish I did I used to.  I’ve gone through all of the one’s that I’ve been gifted.  I don’t know why but I love love love fashion.  I always have.  House fashions, Men’s fashions, All Fashion.  I love crafts, jewlery, shoes, sewing,,,

I find it all fascinating.  Some of my favorite magazines I go through many times, others it is a once through and to the trash or on to the next lucky person to peruse the pages.

The internet is fun I have found to use in place of magazines as well.  I love looking at some fun shopping sites.  I love designer things!  Why? 

Somehow they use a better quality of fabric that you can find at department stores or discount stores.  They are sewn on the bias, and they don’t twist or hang funny when you wear them.  Someone has taken great care in assuring that the garment will last and flatter.

I used to spend my time looking around in fabric stores for this type of fabric.  I’ve come to the conclusion that the Midwest is not in the market for these fabrics, and that I have to settle for the fact that I will never find them.

Which now is beside the point as I have already so many projects to finish that I have ideas’ for that I could never get anything else finished in my lifetime I am sure.  ( ok so that may be a bit of an exaggeration)

I have taken to perusing some designer discount sites.  I will post here some great invitations for you to check out!  You have to register to see the great offerings.  I really like looking at them dreaming that some day they may end up being on my arm or draped flowingly over my body.  I think many of them would make wonderful gifts for those that I know and maybe someday I would be able to afford them at their discounted prices without feeling guilty for buying one of something that at a discount store would have paid for 10…. 

Somehow they have their rewards as well, as discount store purchases rarely last as long, hold up as well, and can fade or look dingy after a very short period of time. 

I’ve always been taught, when it comes to staple items in your wardrobe, get the best as you can afford.  Get the items that are short time items at the discount stores.  You will end up with a quality wardrobe that will last for years.  Black slacks, Basic’s such as belts, Shoes, and Jackets fall into this category for sure.

Well at any rate, here are your invites to my top 2 sale sites!  Enjoy! 

In order to join you must have gotten this invitation!  When you register I think you will get a gift certificate for $10 Free from me!  It is kind of cool too because with your first purchase I think that gives me $10 too!  How fun is that!  This site does something similar too! 


I am also becoming quite the blog reader.  I really love things from seeing how things are made, to well really most anything.  I find that my attention varies with the day and what I am doing or how I am feeling at the moment. 

I read one on Yoga, many on stuffed crafts, some on service dogs, others about those going through health challenges, some from medical professionals, others in business/marketing, etsy artisans, dogs, cooking, parents, friends, sewing, crafting, disability, life in general, news worthy, oh my the list goes on and on. 

One of the main themes I have found of blogs that I love are those written by people from other countries.  Right now most from Australia which I find odd, as it has never been on the list of places that I’d most like to visit.  That may be changing for me as I find so many blogs from that region so interesting.

While I don’t read each post thoroughly, some I do.  I flit about as my interests of the day change.  I use Google Reader to keep track of them all.  I have posted a few that I like on this site as well.  Those that mainly pertain to my situation.  I may post some others soon as well, as I enjoy so many of them and you might as well. 

Changing subjects yet again.  Onyx’s mom called today.  She shared she is doing much better!  Onyx the black lab who’s been staying with us for a few days now, is doing just perfect.  She is a good girl and all of us are not minding her visit one bit. 

On another note.  My phone issues I fear are not over.  Upon returning to Sprint 5th or 6th time this month~, instead of going to Physical Therapy GRRrrrrr, we were told in light of our problems with the refurbished phones, I could have a new one!  Yea! 

They gave me the choice of 3 different versions.  I use a windows based version.  It took me a while to understand the particulars on how to use this one, and I have been on a constant learning track with it.  I can’t imagine switching to a different kind.  I have difficulty remembering all of the new things I need to know.  Names especially take me so much longer than they once used to.  I was a whiz at them before.

Two of the versions had keyboards on their front panel, the other was a new Mogel, instead of a refurbished model.  I opted for the New Mogel.  I have no problems with the phone except it hasn’t worked.  They of course wouldn’t give me the latest model in the series leaving it as bait for me to purchase.  ( which there is now way that could happen as our finances are so tight )  Which is why I pay the outrageous fee’s for insurance. 

My new model should be in on Tuesday.  Then I can download all of my pictures to my computer, HOPEFULLY, as the new model should work perfectly!  Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Actually I may even end up connecting this unworking version as I am feeling desperate in knowing that so much is not backed up.  If there were to be a glitch everything new would be lost.  Quite frustrating.  Ahhh the joy of the electronic age. 

Well, enjoy your Saturday whether it involves shopping, football, working, or a relaxing day of laundry. 


Friday, October 16, 2009

iNsPiRe ~ DeSiRe ~ fRuStRaTiOn

Hot cold Hot cold Hot cold~ tired Excited tired Excited tired Excited…   Doesn’t seem to matter which way the wind blows…  Funny how life works.

I’ve got a head full of ideas, things I would like to do, places I would like to go, people I want to see.  It doesn’t matter how I feel my mind is still dreaming, planning, thinking.  I just wish my body would cooperate! 

I mean it is to some degree.  Things are better.  I do have some really decent days!  My list of things to do seems to get longer instead of shorter.  I have so much to do around here I could never leave the house.  On the other hand I have so much I need to do outside of this house I could never come back. 

For those who have nothing to do everything is due.  Most things get done in some fashion.  Some faster than others.  Priorities of course.  The worst first, getting the most difficult out of the way. 

That thought doesn’t seem to let me have to much fun but the worst things are usually the ones that are the most pressing.  The things I actually enjoy doing I never seem to have time for.  They get pushed out of the picture.  That is why it is so nice to get away from here. 

I can’t wait! 

My Grandmothers were both quite different people, yet their sense of family was strong.  They were both determined one more passive than the other.  You could say one was down to earth and very focused on the past and heritage, the other lived in the present moment, not even really thinking of the future. 

I seem to have things planned out in advance four or five steps ahead, and for a variety of scenarios.  But having grown up around them both, I have a deep appreciation for the past, and the present.  And as we all no the only time we actually do our living is now. 

I got my therapy in today, driving myself of course, dropped a sweatshirt off for Jason at work, and came home in time to meet with a friend about Isagenix.  His wife had asked me to share with him.  Which was pretty cool. 

Not expecting anyone to do what I do, I do enjoy sharing.  I never know who will benefit from something, and I sure enjoy when people think enough of me to share things with me.  Even if they might not be for me. 

This husband gets approached by quite a few people about allot of different types of things.  He gave me quite a compliment, He said he was only listening about this product because I was the one sharing it with him.  He blows most people and products off. 

I really appreciated that.  I’ve worked very hard to build a level of trust with people.  I am so glad that people really respect that I am serious about what I share. 

It takes allot for me to have enough enthusiasm and faith in something to put myself out there and promote it.  I really have to believe in it, it really has to meet my integrity level.   Which not many things do.

So many of the women I recruited into my unit had the same level of integrity as well.  I think that is one of the reasons that each of them are so successful in all that they do. 

One of the gals was a house cleaner, I really respect the work she does, I used to do that.  She does it so well, like my aunt, fanatical about it!   Many others are in the teaching/speech pat professions and work with kids.  Wow, it takes something special to do that, and they all take such pride in it.  None of them were those burnt out teachers, all of them were there for the kids because they loved it!

Mothers, Wives, Students, Professionals, they each did their jobs to the best of their abilities, accepted no compromises from themselves, and set the example actually still do, in what they do.  I just loved that about them.  The fact that they have such integrity, enthusiasm, dedication, loyalty, and caring for what they bring to the world is so inspiring!  It made me want to do better and better for them. 

My gals in Brazil were so much the same way!  I think that is why in spite of everything they are still so successful!  I am so proud of them too!  Careers for women in Brazil are so much more limited, and the income opportunities are much more constraining.  But my gals have stepped up and stepped out into greatness!  I just love it! 

When each day is a fight like today was, therapy was very difficult for me today.  I am so sore, after my two appointments, I came home and just slept most of the evening.  Thank goodness we don’t have a foster puppy right now.  I’d have seriously neglected them today.  We’ve got our crew of two old guys, and our friends old gal!  They all are quite content to sleep right along with me.

I will share sometime soon some fun shopping websites for those of you who love really great things, but don’t like to pay full price for them.  I don’t have the $$ to order from them, but I treat them like the catalogs I receive, looking at the beautiful things and dreaming.  In my catalogs, I get my permanent marker out and do lots of circling!  Makes me feel good to do that!

Kind of like shopping but without pulling out my wallet!

Tomorrow holds more therapy!  Gotta take my phone back into Sprint for the latest crappy replacement phone.  I am so tired of spending my time in that store, up till now for at least 7-8 years I think we’ve been super happy with Sprint and the quality of product they provide.  But after having to already switch out my phone 4 times this month due to their inability to provide me with a working refurbished model..  I am getting quite frustrated!  I have a spare phone, but it doesn’t hold my calendar on it.  With my issues I have that is a very important function for me.  GRRRRR….  Guess tomorrow I will be sitting in their office yet again!  If you’ve been calling or texting and I’ve not responded…. Well, call the house!  Or call Jason.  GRRRRR…


Well, Hugs, and Blessings Nighty Night!

Monday, October 12, 2009

iNsPiRaTiOn 1o1

Inspiration- so many things to me fall into that category. 

Some of the things are small, like how our 14 year old foxhound keeps rising for the day each morning.  ( ok so some days he is up at noon with me )  Each morning I find him to be motivating.  If he can do it I can do it.  He wakes, lays there for a minute or two, stretches, and decides if it is time to start his day or not.  Sometimes getting right up and sometimes sleeping a bit longer before getting up.  I always check to see if he is breathing in the mornings.  I know he has to go at some point, and I hope for his sake he goes peacefully in his sleep.  Having watched my mother die and my lovely doberman Jag die both painfully I pray for those I love to go in their sleep even though the shock would be harder for me to deal with.

Some of the things are larger- like watching my mother and father fight the cancer that was taking over her body.  Dad almost never left Mom during that time, he drove her everywhere.  She wanted to continue working, he would drive her to work, wait til she was done working and drive her home.  While fighting she finished up her Masters Degree.  She walked proudly across stage in her cap and gown!  It was wonderful!  Mom looked great in hats, they  went on a trip early on, while on the trip they found a hat shop, they bought several hats for her to wear instead of a wig.  She looked great with a bald head, and absolutely adorable when she donned a hat!  She knew when to fight the fight and she knew when to just live her life.  My Dad showed me the value of loyalty, love, and true devotion.


I am inspired by a husband who works a 56 hour work week at his regular job, picks up between 4-24 hours of extra work a week, and still does things around the house, runs errands, volunteers for local emergency services ( which is where he is tonight ), helps neighbors, and drives me to appointments each week.  My hero, and my inspiration to work hard to be the best me I can be!

I am inspired by a friend who is making the most of living a life with the different abilities that spina-bifida presents.  He is my age and has been in a wheel chair since I have known him, he has lived in a nursing home for a while now, and is now making heads spin, as he chairs the residence council and is making a positive impact in the lives of the other residents by affecting policies.  He has even attracted the attention of a certain older (no not that much older) person and is now dating.  I was blessed to have had some time to spend with him recently he is focused on the good things!  I just love that!

I am inspired by a woman who sewed her own clothes for her family even her bra’s, who took advantage of an opportunity to make herself look and feel better and was so grateful for what it did for her she shared the same stuff with others!   She not only shared Mary Kay with women who eventually shared it with me, she personally shared with me how I could get my vitamins and loose weight as well.  I am so grateful to her, for not keeping these great things to herself.   Because she decided to share and didn’t keep these things a secret, my skin looks so great, and now so does my body!  And so does the skin of many more women because I decided to share, and the bodies of those I’ve started sharing with are looking and feeling better too! 

I am inspired by people who follow through on what they say they will do.  The people that follow through.  They do their best, they don’t compromise integrity, they strive to do their personal best.  Show people they are valued, show them they are worthy, talk is cheap actions are where the true value is shown. 

I have so many more people in my life who inspire me.  I will try and write about more of them soon.

My cousin J and her family of 5

My friends B&J

My many friends who work for non profit and social service type jobs, not to mention those in the military.

My Sisters and Brothers in Law and their kids

The friends I know who volunteer in so many areas

My former unit members who are strong survivors

My grandmothers


Gosh, my list keeps on going… I guess I have even more to write about than I have mentioned but it is time to go.  My hubby is home and needs some zzzzz’s!


Sunday, October 11, 2009

DiReCtiOnS pLeAsE!

When you have a moment in your day, what do you find you most want to do with it. 

I remember my time before, I never slowed down.  If I wasn’t working I was thinking about working.  I was thinking about how to be more effective, or ways to change, or stay consistent to give things time to flourish. 

If I would have a spare moment, I would spend it learning something new that would help not only me, but help my gals to do better so that they could change their lives.

I know now that what I did was impactful.  I see it in the lives of the women who I served. 

On my visit back to where I grew up, I was able to spend some time with several of my gals.  Each of them has grown, I see the skills that I worked to develop in them coming to fruition.  It is so wonderful to see.

I was never about the money, I was always about the development of the people I was serving.  It is so rewarding to see that change having taken place or still continuing to take place.

I liked watching the money too, but having come from where I came from, having gone through all that I had, it took me quite a long time to get myself strong enough to stand up and get things going for myself.

I see that again in myself.  With each day being not only an emotional struggle, as well as a physical one, I am still finding that the direction I am headed is cloudy. 

Before things for me were so clear.  Where I was going, what I wanted, where I would end up had become second nature to me.  I had thought about it, planned for it, worked toward it, and persisted through all of the hell that one has to go through to break through.  I knew in my heart my goals, dreams and aspirations.  My direction was solid and I was focused.

Now having been derailed, I find myself lost.  Flitting to this flitting to that, I know my mind is on getting well.  But that seems to be so ambiguous.  What is that?  What can I aspire to in that area?  What constitutes when I am as good as I can get?  I don’t know and neither does anyone else.  For each improvement, I seem to run in to a set back.  I was walking and riding the recumbent bike for longer than I had YEA!  But this morning I fell again, I was half asleep and I fell.  It is maddening. 

In fact I was so tired, I didn’t realize that I had actually fallen until I found my dirty clothes in a pile in the other room.  I thought I had dreamt it.  I wondered about telling Jason, felt guilty I hadn’t told him earlier, but I’ve been in a fog all day.  I’ve been having difficulty getting going this day.  Things are clicking along well now.  I am just tired.  But it is frustrating!

I just don’t seem to be getting strong enough fast enough for my liking.  I want to work, I want to do some thing to contribute.  I don’t know what that is.  I am trying to do a few different things.  I like doing them but they each present different obstacles. 

Ahhh, the joy of starting over.  Someday I will have a clear direction for myself.  There is a plan for me I am sure.  I am just not sure which path to follow.  I hope there are some illuminations. 

I did take a few pictures today.  I will add them later.  I am not in the right frame of mind to be able to download them correctly and then get them in good enough shape to post.

I am going to try to get my veggies gone through tomorrow.  Of course tomorrow is when they finish off my root canal.  That should be fun…. another day long visit to the dentist.  Oh, happy day!


Saturday, October 10, 2009

MaDe iT…

The best and the worst… Well that’s how it goes.  I’ve been running low on my Isagenix things.  So I’ve been personally cutting back for a few weeks now.  Sometimes none of it in a day, and sometimes a shake or something.  Good news my size and weight have remained the same.  Bad news I am exhausted have gotten a cold that won’t seem to go away.  :(!

I have been eating what ever is around.  I have been quite successful in eating all of the things in the cupboards.  Which is nice, I think those things can sometimes sit for years if you don’t go through them. 

Jason traveled this past week for two classes, one trip I missed going on with him.  The second trip he dropped me off at my G-Ma’s old home while he traveled on to his class.  I am glad he dropped me off, I had lots of plans, while the first 3 days I was feeling so miserable I couldn’t go hang out as planned.  I did make it to see my sister a bit.  But I sure wasn’t much fun.  My dad was back and drove me around and fed me.  :)  When Jason got back he would take him out for breakfast in the mornings!  I slept.  The week was a rough one but got a bit better toward the end and I was able to get out and around to see my friends and family some.

Jason even was gracious enough to agree to stick around an extra day.  Which made it possible to see my niece play ball, see another classmate and great friend, and hang out with family and watch a great game! 

I got to do see more friends as well, I even got my hair cut!  In an actual style!  My friend who has a wonderful salon, cut my hair.  I washed it before I got there.  I can’t stick my head in those sinks.  It is super cute!  Thanks so much Robyn! 

I came home with lots and lots of new veggies… my garden just wasn’t that successful this year.  I am not sure why, I may have gotten everything planted way to late, especially since this year never did really warm up.  But my cousin sent me home with loads of things!  She even made salsa’s and other canned things that she shared! 

While Dad and Jason were out and about he found a pile of eggplant that needed a new home, so Jason and I went back to get it.  My friend Jen is wanting some of that.  I don’t know if they will last long enough for me to get them to her.   I love eggplant!  My mom made it so good!  I have never been able to do it but maybe someday I will figure it out.

Staying at my G-Ma’s home brings back so many memories.  I really loved growing up there.  I was so active!  I felt quite fortunate while feeling crummy I was able to still walk with Ozzie and Luka around the place.  I got to go out 2 times!  I had intended to be out much more than that, but considering how I felt I was lucky to have done what I did.

Jason sure went above and beyond yesterday, having driven us home, I slept almost all of the way.  I couldn’t move easily and while I tried to stay awake it didn’t work.  He drove back into town to get our friends dog we’d agreed to watch while she was recovering from surgery.  We didn’t have room to get her on our way home.

He was great, he really finished all that needed done, he even helped me get all of the things out of the garden!  Yea! 

I am doing better tonight after quite allot of medication.  I didn’t want to take it but I couldn’t take it any more either.  So, I hope I get a break from the pain this week.  I’ve got lots to do. 

I was able to get the dogs food cooked today, I wasn’t sure if I would be able to do it or not.  The medication kicked in long enough for me to do it!  I am so thankful, so are they!

When I was finishing the nausea started, so I had to rest at the end of finishing their meal, rest, cook, rest, cook, rest, cook.  Well!  I did it and I am happy for that.  I even ran the dishwasher!  So that is my day’s worth of deeds!  I am very happy to have accomplished them.  I had to try quite hard.

Tomorrow, I want to get the things I brought home and got from the garden taken care of.  Not to mention a list of other things!  It would be nice to get things un packed and put away as well.  I’ve got my list ready!

I will try to get some pictures taken and posted!  I think that is always more fun!