Friday, April 30, 2010

NO PHONE ZONE PLEDGE! PLEASE SIGN!

Special Post:

No Phone Zone!  Today is the day!  Sign up to take the pledge today!  It could save your life, it could save the life of someone else.

It could also save someone from ending up injured from an auto accident.   Which if you follow this blog, is why I started it.

Thankfully I was not on the phone the day of my accident.  I did not even have my phone with me.  So I am completely grateful for that.

Choose one:
I will not text while I am driving

I will not text while driving and will use only handsfree calling if I need to speak
        on the phone while I am driving.

I will not text or use my phone while I am driving. If I need to use my phone, I will
        pull over to a secure location.
I am signing the NO PHONE ZONE PLEDGE today!  I encourage you to do the same!

Besides if you drive in the State of Nebraska it is already to text while driving right now!

In addition texting and talking on the phone is as dangerous as driving your car drunk.  See what Dr. Oz shared about your brain on the phone and texting while driving!

  Just found this out today as well!  Dr. Oz and Oprah have been doing allot to increase awareness!

Go HERE and SIGN the NO PHONE ZONE PLEDGE!!  It is important!  Just Sign, Hang Up and Drive!

I couldn't get through to do it on the web page it is so so busy... but I did do it by texting!  ( I am not driving so it is all safe! =) )

How to do make your NO PHONE ZONE PLEDGE by TEXT...  Text: NPZ to 30644  

The conversation can wait.  Don't let distracted driving add catastrophe  to someone's life.

Blessings,
Pink Doberman

BeTtEr

So I keep hoping to get some pictures done and put on here.  I am just not there yet.  I wish I were. 

Last night was not the best night.  While the early part of the day was not good after 2 or 3 or 4... I don't remember which the day got better!  I sat outside!  Yipee.  I even took a few pictures!   Luka was happy to be outside that is for sure!  Once he got accustomed to it.  I set up a different arrangement for him.  I think it worked well! 


I have been hoping to write something positive!  I am so happy today ended better.  I did end up making lunch for us.  Although I think Jason wishes I hadn't.  It was not one of the best meals that I had made.  In fact I think it was one of the ones Jason liked the least in our whole marriage.

I have not been cooking meals to eat for weeks.  I feel lucky just to be able to get myself something heated up or a shake made.  I must have been eating lots of bars too as they are all gone.  =(.   Fresh fruit has been another great food edition these days.

Jason has been also making lots of frozen pizza.  I think that is just great... except.  I really need to get some energy to make myself a bunch of gluten free crusts.  I am getting back on track with that.  Why does it all have to be so hard?  I wish I had the energy to do it all!  I haven't even cleaned the house in ages.

Thank goodness Jason is doing laundry.  ( He had to, he ran out of underwear.)    I was trying to some earlier in the week but golly gee... I did not get very far. 

Well, anyhow tonight has been pretty nice.  I took some simple pictures in our back yard.  When Jason got home he took some more.  We sat out on the bumper in the back yard as well.  It was nice.  We just sat out there and chatted.  I have a new idea for where I want the rest of my garden.  Jason is not thrilled by the idea I am sure. 

Check out Sjogrens Syndrome here.  ( Just spreading the awareness!)

Well that is all for now.

Pink Doberman

 

Thursday, April 29, 2010

ShOeS..

Shoes!  Can I tell you again how I really love shoes!  I've been bit again by the shoe bug!  I am partial to Brazilian Shoes!  But I pretty much love all pretty shoes!  I think my room would be shelved in shoes if I had my way! 

My friends at the Buckle have some the shoes that have inspired this post.  I am in the mood for pretty shoes.  I put a pair of my naughty naughty heels on the other day and walked about in them for a minute.  I really miss my shoes.  I don't dare wear them much.  I am wobbly at best these days.  I still dream of wearing my shoes again.

Soon!  That is my hope.  Jason has finally worked enough that I can start back to the Dr. again as well as get started back to therapy.  Down side to that between him working all that he does the only other thing that he will be able to do is drive me to the appointments.  They have already started, but will be back to full swing next week.  I wish it hadn't taken us this long to gather enough funds.  But I can't stand owing all of these places so much money.  We still will have to deal with some bills but with him continuing to work all that he does and has scheduled I think we will make it through.  Maybe not gracefully but hey, who is graceful these days??

I am grateful for getting back to the Dr. and therapy.  I've been sliding backwards which has been discouraging.  I am trying some new things so who knows.  I am praying for a miracle, in more ways than you can imagine!

I went for a walk yesterday with Jason we went a few blocks.  It was great!  Unfortunately my legs started to give out before we got back home.  He carried me the rest of the way.  Just moving around the house today too they started to get weak.  So I really am going to have my work cut out for me!  If my neck isn't bugging me something else starts as I over do in other areas.  grrrr.

My neck has done pretty well today actually.  I am happy about that.  I did read a post today about a gal who I've been reading about who has begun to get denials from her insurance for her recovery.  This makes me sick.  She is still in recovery and if her therapy does not continue she may never get any semblance of her life back.  It is so scary!  She is a young mother who has had a stroke she used to work as a model.  Read about Katherine here.



I also wanted to take a moment to write a HUGE HUGE THANK YOU to my friend!  I've got a new to me computer!  Jason has his back at work with him regularly and I can now access the internet!  There is more work to be done in this area, but thanks to my gracious and giving friend I am able to be all hooked up.  I forget when my computer died but it has been quite some time.  It was such a great surprise for me.  I am just so grateful!  I've also been quite grateful for Jason letting me keep his computer with me since mine had crashed. 

Life is good!  I am blessed! 

Here is to getting your toes some sunshine!

Pink Doberman

Monday, April 26, 2010

SaFeTy FiRsT

So hello.  Oh my what a period of time.  I haven't felt like writing much.  I am not sure why.  I think it might have to do with all of the pain being so intense even when I am not moving.  I am pretty sure I am now at the point where all of my injections have completely worn off. 

I have even tried writing several posts.  I just didn't seem to have any personal rhythm. Which I find very difficult to deal with.  What I have done today which I feel quite positive about I will share with you.

I made it to my Dr.'s appointment all on my own.  I drove.  I don't know if it was the best thing or not.  I have been hurting so badly just doing nothing that driving seemed like another stab in my neck, if you know what I mean..

But I did it.  I always promise myself that if I find myself doing anything stupid behind the vehicle or make any traffic errors even though they may be minor.. that I will stop immediately re assess my situation if I should just rest some more or if I should find someone to come get me and not drive any longer, or find a hotel, or if I should just turn around and get myself and my car home. 

I don't drive while I am taking pain medication.  I tend to get Loo LOO on that stuff.  I just fog out and get sleepy and more spacey than usual.  I do however take my raise my blood pressure medication so I am able to legally drive a car.  On the medication my blood pressure was 100/60 when I arrived at the Dr.'s office.  This medication does nothing for my pain, but it does give me more energy to deal with the pain.  It also helps me not get vertigo.

I don't know if those are good choices or not.  But that is what I do.  I really try not to be behind the wheel of a car.  I like to drive!  I really do!  I used to LOVE to drive, and if I were not in so much pain, I would still LOVE to drive.  But driving does make the pain even worse. 

Anyhoo... The trip was a success.  I also made it to drop a couple packages in the mail so Susan and Martha be looking for your goodies! 

I have officially been diagnosed with some spring related allergies.  I had had allergies in my eyes, still do.  Don't drink milk, she suggested that even though I do not have celiac's disease that I avoid gluten because of my sinus allergy issues and the way my insides feel. 

She is also sending me to another specialist for my neck and balance issues.  She also is running some more blood work tests.  So I can stay on top of the Osteoporosis stuff.

So when the results get back I will know even more.  She is hoping that the new specialist will be able to lend me some assistance.  I hope so too!

Jason also has gotten some great news today as well!  I am super excited about this!  He now holds a "position" at his job.  After over three years of not being specifically assigned he now is assigned!  I am so happy for him.  He only had applied for one spot, luckily he got it!  Things are going so well for us in so many areas.  It is nice!  I am so happy!

The photography hobby is super fun!  Super super fun!  It is even nicer that we can share it with our friends and family!  My brother in law gets his braces off today and so I am sure we will be headed that direction soon to take some pictures of them!  I can't wait.  It is the perfect time of year to get out and give them a visit! 

I really don't know why, but I have been in a compulsive eating mood as of late.  I think it is because I've been so miserable with pain.  But if I keep this up I will be miserable with not being able to fit in to my clothes!  Ha Ha!!!

Yesterday and today things seem to be better. 

Although yesterday, I was busy with life!  It was a fun day.  Jason and I met with friends who have asked him to take pictures of their wedding!  Nervous of course about doing something so big.  But also thrilled!  To have been asked to do something so special for our friends!  Besides it is a great gift to give them! 

The appointment went well.  I was medicated during it which I guess caused me to babble quite allot.  I was mainly trying to stay engaged so I didn't space out and miss something important.  I was also trying very hard not to fall to sleep.  I kept fighting the disappear mentally mode that the pain medication gives me.  I think I did pretty well.  I did however fall fast asleep at his parents home.  I was a groggy mess at their home. 

Thank goodness Jason did all of the driving.  Thank goodness I really mean for everyone else who was on the road.  In speaking with my Dr today.  I shared how frustrated I am that all of these people who get dizzy and who take all of these prescriptions are able to be out driving around.  I don't drive when I take the pain medications.  I know because these are the same people whom I meet in the Dr's office waiting rooms.  I strike up conversations and next thing I know I hear their whole life's story and then I watch them insert the keys to their ignitions and drive off. 

Makes me wonder what the guy who was the cause of my car accident was taking that day.  I hate that people do not take other people into consideration before they get behind the wheel of a vehicle.  It makes me crazy.  Just like the sand truck/semi driver who ignored his stop sign to pull out on to the highway, while using only one hand on the wheel and the other on his CB radio.  OMG REALLY!? 


I just don't know.  Even my Dr is amazed at who they give drivers licenses to.  WoW!

This isn't what I really wanted my post tonight to be about. 
But don't drive drunk, even if it is a prescription drunk!  It still does not make it SAFE!

I finally got home and could take some pain medication.  I wish I could have done more while I was out and about, but I was exhausted from all that I did do.  I felt really good about being able to do it safely as possible for myself today.  Jason will be here to drive me tomorrow.  That will be so nice.

So here I sit safe and sound and finally getting some relief from my pain.  I have also rested quite a bit and am now doing better. 

Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

bLuCkY

Well it has been a while since I last posted.  My body is still not at all happy.  This is what I get for trying to do more I suppose.  It is so nice outside I want to be up moving around.  Problem is, if I do I need more medication, the more I move the more medication.  Then even when I stop moving I am still needing more medication for days for my body to recover.  I am so frustrated!!!!

I have not been writing much.  I have not been around a lap top to write with.  Sitting at a computer at a desk does not happen much and does not happen for long. 

This post is in my bed and with Jason's laptop.  Glad he lets me use it.  It won't be a long post.  I was informed that I had not written in a while.  I don't feel much like moving let alone examining how I feel. 

I am medicated.  I may soon be more medicated.  Yesterday I was so medicated I felt sick from being so medicated.  Nausea.... Pain..... funny vision.... 

Well I have the pain and funny vision today.  can't tell you how happy I am about this.  I am just going to sit here and go back to my stupor. 

My husband and friends have been great.  I will just say that.  This whole time has not been completely unproductive or horrible there have been some very nice moments. I am however:::  WoW --- feeling the pain.  I just want to shut it all off.   If it were warmer, I would go lay in the sun and forget about it all. 

And sorry no pictures.  Can't think about doing that right now.  I'll be back soon I am sure.  I did get my injections rescheduled.  I think.  I know I called them, I just can't remember when.  I should stop writing so I don't feel any worse about myself. 

Life will be better soon.  Meantime I am not moving!

P.D.

Friday, April 16, 2010

a bLuR

So I am tired I need to be sleeping.. Just haven't been able to turn the ole mind off.  My body has been screaming at me for a while now.  I keep sitting up, then laying back, then getting up, then laying down, then turning here, then turning there..  I was supposed to get to the Dr.  It got postponed.

Jason wouldn't take me and canceled the appointment.  I wasn't able to get myself up and around.  I was so much in pain.  Lots of medication later and a whole day or so.  grrrr...  frustration..  Although any of my medication makes me loopy from one direction or another.

I don't know what to do.  I guess just waiting is the only thing.

Any how's I've got a friend planning to come over some time soon.  She is recovering from brain surgery.  I should have her write a guest post.  Hmmmm now that is a thought!  I've got lots of nifty friends who are quite interesting.  You might be seeing more of those since I am having difficulty as of late writing much.  Although the other day I did manage to get several posts off.  Of course you are reading them delayed.. But I do like having something heading out to the world if possible.  It makes me feel as if I have accomplished something even if I am in bed and miserable.

Sorry no picture this time.  Hope you've enjoyed the plum pictures!  Luka is doing well.  He is eating carrots for snacks now~

My super man is still solving problems around here!  He is just amazing!  I am in love!

I was going to share about lots of other things, but I can't think so it is time to end.

Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Thursday, April 15, 2010

rEaLiZaTiOn.. SaLvAgE tHe bEsT!

So I was catching up on a little reading tonight.  I've been neglecting to read several of the blogs I have subscribed to.  Which is perfectly fine as they aren't going anywhere!  =)!

I have either been in to much pain or to busy trying to get things done around here, and today I went out twice and drove once! (An Unexpected Blessing!)  Not very far, but I got out on my own with Luka!  More on that later.

While reading the blogs I came across this one.  Kara Swanson's Brain Injury Blog.  This post struck me today
I hope you will take a minute to check it out. 

If you have read her post then the rest of this will make more sense.  For the longest time I held on to my life.  Held on to the hope of having it back.  I still do I guess.  Emotionally that is.  I need to let that girl go and bury her.  Start over fresh.  

My mom passed, and the three of us girls did that.  Dad told us what was important to him, and we took care of the rest.  We were immediate about it.  While it was not easy, it was cathartic.  We each saved what made us happy.  The rest of her life was gifted to others donated or sold.  My dad moved on dramatically as well.  He had a period of struggling to find a proper age appropriate way to move on, but he figured it out with a little help {Wink} and is doing well. 

Are you ever over loosing someone?  I don't think so, but you are able to move on a make a new life for yourself.  When I was given the opinion from the Dr.'s that I was going to be better in 2 Days 2 Weeks and 2 Years..  time kept going on and so did my hope to return to my life.  YEARS WENT BY... Hope held on.  Finally I looked at my Doc.  I said.  I am not going to ever be like I was am I?  He finally said that I was not. 

I think I was at 4 -5 years into this when he told me that.  I was sick.  Emotionally sick, but Emotionally relieved as well.  I had been fighting this whole time to get that life back.  All of the energy I had was focused on the past.  Focused on getting back to that.  Time had gone on.  Even if I could physically get back together, I would never have "that" life back. 

And at this point I didn't even really have a life to hold on to at that moment.  Not of my own.  But I did with the relationship with my husband.  So I hang on to that as I try build one for myself.  I miss who I was.  I am hopeful that who I am becoming will mean something. 

I have lost myself before.  This is the second time.  It is hard to salvage and move on. 

Who I am changed each time.  Who I had to be was different.  Who I will be will be different. 

But I will also be exactly the same. 

Thanks Kara for sharing your story.

Blessings,

Pink Doberman

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

pLuMmY

Blessings are around every corner.  Jason took me out for one of our weekend drives.  We hadn't been on one since last year.  It was nice.  What was even nicer was the beautiful things that we saw while out driving around. 

We stopped parked the Jeep and Jason got out.  We saw something that I thought it would be fun to have a closer view of.  But I was tired already. 

Jason took the camera out of the bag and took a hike. 

I love what he showed me.

 



















































The plum trees were beautiful!  These are the kind of flowers that I love for Jason to bring home.  They last forever and never will wilt.  I love them.   Wish he could have captured their fragrance!  That is about all that is missing wouldn't you agree?

I loved the night out.  It turned into quite the adventure. 

Blessings and Plum Dreams,
Pink Doberman

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

YiPeEEEEEE!

I have just realized that this is the first winter since the car accident that I have made it through the winter feeling no worse for wear physically!  Woo HOO!  I stayed inside almost all winter and I am out attacking life with as much as I have got.  ( It isn't much I admit, but I am doing what I can.)  It feels good.  I worked in the garage again today.  Jason read my frustration about my garden happenings or not happenings... 

Leftover seeds!  I have seeds from last year.  I don't know how many of them will actually sprout and be productive, but it gives me hope.

He got the garden all cleaned out, moved some strawberry plants into pots and even pulled out some over grown grass.



He also discovered that I have quite the crop of onions going already in the garden! 














Which is super cool, as the onions I planted last year I thought would die over the winter.  NOPE!  They are alive!  Woo Hoo!  And they are thriving!  Which is most wonderful I must say!





The birds have been very active around here!  I am really enjoying the different varieties that come by my window.











I got some pots ready for planting today, Jason cleaned out all of the large square outdoor pots!  Yea!  Those are hard for me as they sit so low.  He also tossed some flower seeds in them as well, which is super!  We should have some pretty flowers this year!  If the seeds work that is.  =).



Frustrations never cease around here it seems though, one of his radio antenna's bit the dust, two batteries for his power drill no longer work... and while getting his broken antenna off his bumper, he damaged his bumper and now needs another part for his wrangler.. and the battery in his truck won't stay charged..  Oh my!

In addition to the clasps he needs for his soft top that he just remembered after a winter of not thinking about his broken soft top..  Oh joy..  Life does indeed continue to toss us some curve balls, but nothing that can't be fixed over time. 

He has just figured out a solution to his truck battery! 
My husband is so smart!  He has it hooked up to start with solar power!  How cool is that!  What a Mr. Smarty Pants!!  I love it! 




I need to figure out a bread type recipe.. so I can eat my new organic peanut butter!  Which tastes marvelous I might add, I have been having it with my soy/coconut ice cream.  MMMMMmmmmMMMM.... Hot Fudge is also a welcome addition to my concoction as of late!  Can you say heaven?


I might have to break down and have this tasty treat AGAIN tonight!  We brought desert to a friends house and we made an ice cream bar!  It was awesome!  We've really been indulging lately!  I think it has been something that Jason and I needed... fun food that gives us the feeling of not being in our "normal" life!

We've got a plan. It might take us a while to get things accomplished, but we will get there.   

I did go out and weed the strawberry bed a bit more.. good thing Jason was here.  Bending down like that, well let's just say it would have been interesting if he hadn't been home.  He picked me up out of the strawberry bed and carried me back into the house to rest.  I was better later.  But I know better than to go pulling weeds with out him being home.  Hopefully by the end of summer I will be able to do that again. 

Here is a picture of the seed boxes.  I managed to get some of the seeds put in them as well.  I did that several days ago, and they are still sitting in the garage.  I need to get some water on them and get them in the sun.  Someday, one day soon.  I know that will happen. 

I did get some laundry done, and the dishwasher unloaded.  The hand wash dishes are still waiting for me.  Guess they are going to have to wait a little longer.



Faith is here. 



Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Monday, April 12, 2010

PeRsPeCtiVe

So my last post being from a while a go, spoke to Luka's allergies to food.  I am hopeful that things are starting to work themselves out.  I have gotten the upset tummy under control it seems.  Thank goodness!  That was miserable. 

Things are going rather well, besides the fact minute by minute I never know how long I am going to have to feel well or how long I am going to have to feel crummy.  But I can handle this.  The warmer weather leaves me feeling less stiff and sore.  It also helps when I have reached my limits as I am stuck in bed not moving for hours and I can look outside and see everything starting to green up and listen and watch the birds outside my windows. 

Jason and I got some more bird seed the other day.  He's been learning about that as well.  We bought "big" bird food and "little" bird food.  Hopefully this will keep the big birds away from the little birds.  We will soon see.  The big bird feeder needs a bit of sprucing up.  I am hoping Jason will be able to paint it and make it a bit shinier. 




Of course the list for sprucing things up has grown.  But who's to say that it doesn't add a little charm to some things if they look a little worn. Problem is that most of our things are looking that way.  =) I guess we are just charming!  That's my thought and I am sticking to it. 

I really don't want to be 'That' house.. the one that everyone cringes as they drive by.  I think we might be getting closer to that... but I hope we can make some improvements this year to make where we live a little more appealing to the eye.  We are doing what we can at any rate.  I guess that is all that we can ask of ourselves.

In the meantime we are trying to live.  I've got lots to say for sure.  I have been rather occupied as of late.  Which I am thoroughly enjoying.  I must say that I didn't want to be writing right now.  I was hoping to go yet another day with out posting.  I over did it again. 

Well, I stopped my actions before I couldn't get myself to bed on my own. So that is a good thing.  But, I woke this morning to a migraine, after having taken lots of pain medication for my neck last night.  Jason got me a migraine pill before going off to work.  That helped.  I woke again feeling rather well.  Thrilled!  I set about doing some things so I could have a clearer mind.  Messy house makes messy mind. 

At least it does for me.  While picking up things about the house, I completely remembered a favor I had promised a friend.  I felt so bad.  I called her and left a message apologizing and hoping to redeem myself.  Thank goodness I remembered!  I could at least apologize. 

I am listening to the television as I type.  Knit & Crochet Today just came on PBS!  This is the first time I have been sitting to watch TV when this show is on since I have learned the basics of knitting.  I am so excited. The show today is featuring knitting and crochet mixed!  How cool is that!  I of course have to master the basic stitch in crochet...   Ok so I am already confused by the pattern...  I will someday be able to understand this. 

The knitting has been great for me though.  It is really helping.  I get allot of anxiety sometimes.  Having the needles in my hand gives me something tangible to do and to focus on.  All I know how to do is pearl.  I just learned that word today, just now!  Hey, that is a start!  I am learning something! 

The knitting has also been great for me when I am not able to sleep, or when I don't have the computer and I have to sit still to let my body rest.  My mind always seems to be running.  Unless I am on pain medication.  Then it is running but woozie.  So the simple pearl stitch seems to work for me as well.  While I dream of making socks, sweaters, and dresses out of yarn, I think it is going to be the basic blankets and scarves for a while from this girl. 

You've gotta start somewhere.  I am hoping to find some really great cotton yarn, that is soft and will hold itself well.  But make a good stable blanket.  If I get good enough at this I may even be able to make some things as gifts. 

I am not going to share the project I am making.  I think it is ugly.  It is however a great learning project.  I am using acrylic yarn, and it is camouflage colored!  Lots of men are even doing this!  How cool is that! 

The birds outside are having a great day.  We have a beautiful Cardinal Couple that lives near here, a Dove Couple, many Finch Couples and lots of Black colored birds.  Oh, and a Blue Jay!    I think they are all just beautiful!  I never really cared much about birds before.  I knew that people watched them for sure.  I just was always to busy and to focused on my Mary Kay to appreciate watching the birds.  I don't think that was bad at all, but just different.  Really I would love to go back to that life.  But I am also happy watching birds.  I am having to learn to be happy where I am at.  Appreciate what I have and be grateful for it.  Believe me I am, even though it would seem as if I have to talk myself into it each day. 

That is apart of moving forward I think. 

Today, I am grateful for the fact I was able to clean the mirror in my bathroom and wipe off the counter as well.  I got the dirty towels and washcloths put in the laundry and dumped the rest of the laundry downstairs too.  I also sorted the laundry.  That is what did me in.  That is why I am now writing another post sitting in bed.  Crawling around on the floor to sort everything into laundry piles is exhausting for my body. 

I really did debate whether to do this or not.  But Jason is so busy these days and it is his least favorite thing to do.  Well, I don't know about least favorite.  I truly think that all cleaning activities are his least favorite.  He does do them but I don't think he does them with a sense of joy.

I thought to myself, if I do the laundry or do some laundry,  that will be one thing that he won't have to do.  I got all of the clothes in our bedroom put away.  Our bedroom couch is all cleared off.  It looks just great!  So when he gets home he will notice I am sure.  He likes a clean house, and appreciates it when he does not have to be the one doing it.  I used to hire someone to do the housework.  I really liked that.  I could then focus more on Jason and my Mary Kay clients and team members.  I never have been great at doing EVERYTHING.  But I have been great at doing things I could focus on.

If I can focus on one thing, I truly believe I can be great at it.  These days it is even harder to do that.  It seems as what I now focus on is doing all that I can without doing to much.  How frustrating. 

But I do feel lucky that I can at least do things some days.  Like the laundry.  I am also going to be taking some online classes!  I am super excited about this as well!  YEA!  I have been looking for some learning opportunities online!  I have finally found some! 

So I will be sharing those with you soon as well. 

I have one thing that is pretty constant in my life no matter how I feel.  I have passion.  I have it for things, about things, through things, around things, with things.  I think that is what keeps me going.  I am grateful for my passion. 

It sometimes will cloud my judgment, other times it clarifies it.  It can be a hindrance as well as a help.

I had thought about making something in my craft room downstairs today.  I was feeling so well.  But my passion for doing something to show my appreciation for all of Jason's hard work won out.  I am also hoping to finish the dishes.  I need to unload the dishwasher, and hand wash a pile of dishes that have been waiting for someone to clean them for a week. 

I also need to finish totaling up the information for taxes.  But I can't think about that until this other stuff is done.  I think I made the right decision to not finish a craft project.  But it is something I hope to be able to do sometime as well. 

My garden... well, I will have some photos to show you soon as well.  I can't wait.  Jason has just been wonderful!  I am very fortunate.  I know that! 

I hope you are fortunate too.
Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Thursday, April 8, 2010

uGGGG..... & tHeN..

Not to sure what to do with Luka.  It is frustrating.  It is highly frustrating.  He keeps getting sick.  I guess we will have to take him in and add to the compounding vet bill.  Geesh..  It breaks my heart.  I keep trying to find ways to keep him healthy and happy, so he can continue to be with me as long as possible.  Ugg.

I am sure we will figure something out, I have a very smart vet.

My anxiety level is high today.. I can feel my heart just pounding... I am feeling a bit neurotic.  I am trying to be calm.  Trying to relax.  I don't know if it was the loud noise that Luka and I heard today or what.  But I am very edgy and feeling quite anxious and irritable.  Just Breathe.. Just Breathe..  I need to find something to zone out on..   This is not doing the trick.

~~~
Things are better.. it just takes time.  Isn't that so true.

I am watching Extreme Home Makeover..  It is a really great show tonight.  It really speaks to me.  I don't talk about this much.  In fact it has been really hard to talk about this since my accident. 

To top it off Jason is adopted.  These people, along with his parents, people I've know from my childhood, and friends who have adopted kids are all very special in my heart.  I've learned by example from people in my life, and many many of my friends were also adopted.  It is always something I thought I would be able to do some day. 

When I imagined my 40's I thought they would be filled with people that I loved and who loved me.  I do have some of that, but I quite honestly imagined I would be able to give more back to others, and have more people in my life.  I feel the exact opposite of that.

That is all I am going to say on the subject.  It is just hard.
Sorry no picture this time..  Soon!



I love this!  This would make a great gift!

This is also neat!  It would make someone else a great gift!

How cute is this!

Chique!


I did enjoy looking at these things.  They all popped up on the recently listed items section..


So I had finished this post and I am now returning to it.  I just had an uncanny conversation with a friend of mine whom I have never met, but non the less she has been an important part of my thoughts.  She and I talked about allot of what I had just wrote and more.  I needed that.  I wrote before about how it is nice to let people know that you are thinking of them.  It really is.

Someone just did that for me.  She almost read my mind.  I hope we will be able to go to Joel Osteen's church service together sometime.  I look forward to the day we will meet. 

At any rate, it is hard for me some days to be optimistic.  I really do try.  I don't mean to not be.  It is just hard.  Holidays are.  Especially when you feel alone. 

She blessed me today!  I am grateful for wonderful people in my life!  My heart is full.

Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

OuTsiDe iN a PaRk

I am thrilled to be having some good days.  I was able to be out and about with Jason the other day!  It was wonderful.  I was having pretty good balance and not to bad of pain.  It was lovely, the sun was shining!  We took lots and lots of pictures!  That was super fun..  (He took lots and lots of pictures!) 

I went along for the ideas..  I am not the best at these things but I am having fun with it.  It has been that I would share what I would like to have pictures of and he would go out and find it.  In addition to what he wanted to take pictures of of course.  But it is so fun for me to go with him.  We are pretty low key about it and it is so nice to be out and about doing something with him. 

Luka would have loved the day as well.  We went to a park.  But since I have been doing some food experimentation I thought it was best that he stayed home.  No one wants a dog with an upset tummy!  His tummy is doing so much better!  Which is wonderful!  I am getting things figured out.  Wish he wouldn't have to suffer through my inadequacies. 



The day was glorious though, not to cold, I thought it was going to be.  It was chilly.  I wore a tee shirt a bulky sweater a jacket a scarf and brought gloves along too!  It worked out rather well.  I used everything but the gloves and I did not freeze to death!  Of course I think I was wearing more than EVERYONE else who was out that day, but who cares! 



We even met up with some friends!  We took their pictures too!  That was really fun!  They did a great job of having fun in front of Jason's lens. 

We even stopped to see our friends baby.  By then I was getting pretty tired.  I did not say anything of course as then Jason would have just taken me straight home.  I really wanted to go see our friends at the hospital! 
So we did.  I even held the new little guy for a bit.  (About 2 minutes.)  Before my arms could not do it any longer.. I was even sitting in a chair with arm rests.. I was bummed.. but hey.  I don't hold many babies.  It has been hard for me to do, and I would not want to drop them.  The chair worked out great it provided good support so dropping was not going to happen..

He is adorable!  He was awake and everything!  Pretty cool!..  until my arm started freaking out..  His proud papa then held him until he fell to sleep.  Mom and Dad are doing great!  The nurses think Mom is super mom, she was up and about the day or so after her C section! 

She looks gorgeous and radiant as well of course!

We had a great visit with them!  By the time I was done I could not hide my exhaustion.  But I was so happy to have gone to see them!  Jason had a great time too!  We really like hanging out with our friends!  I am sure we will be getting together for supper in a bit as well.  At least I would like to. 

Look at what the military is testing? 

It was a great day! 

Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

GaRdEn ?? uNkNoWn..

I have got the gardening blues.  You see I swore by now that I would have ordered my seeds and plants.  Or have started things inside the house from seed to grow.  But none of the above has happened. 

This year has been pretty close to the belt so far.  I do have a few old seeds.  Which I will be planting.  You never know, Right?? 

I had planned what I was going to do all winter.  I have frustration.  I need to grow things so we can afford to feed Luka... his diet is cost prohibitive.  At the same time we need to feed ourselves.. who would have thought this is where we'd be right now. 

I know that things will always find a way to happen.  God is good and provides what I have always needed.  I should just stop worrying.  But the doubt and fear sometimes creep in. 

Gardening while not easy for me to do, it gives me a reason to get out of the house and at least get the water turned on and off for the plants.  Other days, when I can do more, that is even better!  I really love digging in the dirt.  Planting season is only 15 days away..

My garden..  See pictures from the past!

Here are some more memories...




Here is a blog that I have found that features Gluten Free Recipes.  While I have yet to try these I am enjoying reading about them.  So for those of you that have some allergies or in-tolerances, or just wanting some variety, check this cute blog out!




Some more neat Etsy things..

Frames

This would be pretty in my friends home for fall..

Dog Vests.. this Etsy shop makes things for dogs!  How cool!


There is this little mini!  I'd wear leggings with it personally!


So we have a couple of doves in our yard.  Which is pretty cool.  They love each other and are usually near to each other.  It is fun to watch.


Well, here I am realizing that a garden of some sort will come to pass.  Just going to fly by the seat of my pants on this one. 

I know that blessings come in all shapes and sizes.


Speaking of blessings, I hope that you had a wonderful Easter filled with family and great food. 

Pink Doberman

Sunday, April 4, 2010

MaY yOuR DaY bE bLeSsEd

OnE mOrE DaY.

Things are better and better.  I guess a big storm system blew through.. Although we did not get much of it here I must have been feeling it.  I am doing so much better just exhausted now!  Thank God!  Easter weekend should be just beautiful!  I hope it is for everyone. 

Things are pretty calm around here these days.  I am happy with that I guess. 

We have friends with a new baby!  That is divine!  Another who is doing well after having brain surgery.  Several friends being thought of this week who have kids with Autism.  A cousin who has kids with Traumatic Brain Injury who has just closed on a house they will be fixing up.  Another friend who had a fire in her home is her new roof on her house this week, another who is going through a traumatic divorce.  Four weddings coming up.. life is amazing. 

Birds are beautiful..


Friends with birthdays, others who are finding jobs, one who has survived cancer, another who has had a foster daughter change her name to include hers.  Some other friends are dealing with the loss of their mother or father.   I am also sure there are more whom I am sure are going through something whether it be exciting, traumatic, or normal that I have not heard from.  Life moves on it takes turns, and will always come to an end. 

I personally like living in the dashes.  The things in between birth and death.  I really like all that people can cram in that little tiny dash.  A person from the town in which I live is headed back to the space shuttle!  How cool is that!  Clay Anderson will be making his second trip in to space.  Talk about a person who never gives up.  While I have met him, (most people in town have if they wanted to)  I knew his mom.  She was an amazing person herself.  PBS did a special on him as well!  Here is his Wiki Profile..  You can even follow him on Twitter


It is official, Luka has some sort of upset tummy, he has now thrown up three times.  He is going to have to stay at home for a few days, not that we've gone anywhere recently any how.  But I was hoping to.  We will just have to see how that is all going to work out. 




Some more Etsy things..

This is beautiful!  Very stylish!

How adorable for someones little girl! 

Reminders of my childhood.   It is truly amazing what you can find on Etsy!   

Excited about some things coming up.  It is nice to have things to look forward to.  Even if they are simple!

Hope you are looking forward to something!  I am... I am looking forward to some Peeps and Malted Milk Eggs!

Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Saturday, April 3, 2010

ShOpPiNg

Sometimes I really wonder. 

Not sleeping well last night it was no wonder that Luka's nose found me..  his persistence paid off and I woke up enough to take my medication.  Thankfully so!  Not sure what happened but I am still feeling horribly achey and sore today.  I am wondering if I need to take even more medication.  I am doing well but can only imagine what today would have been like with out him. 

Jason woke up too, because every time I try to be quiet, I think I am noisier that ever!  So frustrating.  At any rate it was nice because Luka just was not calming down.  So he got put in bed by me.  Thank goodness for our king sized bed.  Jason needs it anyway because of his size but with three of us in here I am so grateful for it.  Especially since I am the one in the middle. 

Luka dutifully curled up next to me and slept there with me all morning.  Which I was glad for.  Often if he alerts on me he sticks to me like glue.  Which is so nice. 

On another topic, the food I made him yesterday of reheated potatoes did not seem to agree with him.  He got sick late this morning.  Not at all what I wanted to deal with but hey, at least I could. 

So I will try cooking the food yet again, I am guessing the raw eggs did not meld with the potatoes therefore some how upsetting his stomach.. That was the only difference this time..

I have also stopped the dry food.  Since doing these adjustments I did not want to confuse my results so I will start the kibble again next week to check out what happens.


I wish things were a little simpler.  The load of laundry I was planning to fold yesterday is still sitting here.  I ended up cooking something to eat rather than folding the load of laundry.  I've been staring at it.  I hope to get that done today.  Although I am sure that some of it will be so wrinkled that it will need to go back into the dryer.  ( that is my pet peeve.. wearing wrinkled clothes ) 

My whole body feels like it weighs a ton today, my legs hurt in strange places my arms hurt in strange places.. gosh I really don't know what is going on.  I am guessing I have just over done things.  So here I sit.  I have been looking out the window at the birds.  Jason got a couple more pictures which is so nice! 



I have also been looking at some things online as well.  Mostly facebook as I am not doing well in the thinking department today.  It is on again off again for me.  Besides my head is still hurting.  The additional medication is sounding better and better..  Probably should go find some more before I forget again..

I am doing pretend shopping on Etsy today!  Looking at all of the beautiful things and imagining that I have just ordered them.  Some for myself and some for gifts for others.  I do this in catalogs and magazines as well, only I grab a permanent marker and do it with them.  Today I am only doing the internet thing. 

It makes me feel better.  I can't say why, but since I have always loved shopping I guess it stands to reason.  Besides, doing it this way is much easier, I can have an unlimited budget and can gift everyone I know!   Have you been to Etsy?  Surely you have!  It is where you can find anything made by hand, and some old things as well.  


You can find things from the Wild and Fun to the Simple and Chique! 

Here are some of the fun things I have found!  I think these would be great to wear to an exercise or dance class.  I love the white ones!  Brazilian Style of course!!  Cha Cha Cha!

This would be pretty in my hair I think! 


This is just so lovely!

This reminds me of four special little girls!   

My niece would love this!

I love vintage jewelry

Well you get the idea!  I could go on and on and on all day!  I mostly just sit and look at the recently posted items.  I have never purchased anything off of Etsy.  I would love to!  But just can't justify it.  Jason says I can justify anything I want.  But little does he know how long my list can go! 

Mind boggling.. and NO I do not sit here and think of every thing I can't have and be miserable!  Quite opposite, I am just happy that there are people out there living their dreams, following their passion and I love seeing what great things they come up with.  You never know.. some day I may become an Etsy purchaser!  For now I will be a dreamer!

Here's to happy dreams!
Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Friday, April 2, 2010

HiS bUSy DaY!

What another nice day.  For sure!  I am so happy about the weather!  The birds are out chirping again!  I could get used to this! 

This morning I was doing pretty well, the eggs got delivered!  Yeah, I reheated the potatoes that I had left out of Luka's first batch of food and Jason mixed them up! 

When Jason arrived home this morning he was busy working to get the things I wanted done finished.  That was until he learned that the telephone systems for the county were not functioning.  He then went to sit and wait for possible emergencies at the volunteer fire station.  He was there for many hours.  When he arrived back home he started some yard work.  He worked hard at dethatching our lawn.  He got one section of it done before coming in to mix up the food shower and run out to another teaching job. 

Thank goodness for these teaching jobs, we've had a huge break in them this winter, it is really showing in our financial state.  Hopefully change is right around the corner!  While I hate that he is gone, we will love it when we can have a little more stability. 

I keep trying to do things.  Today started off well, until I took a shower.  While drying my hair, something happened and my neck flared up again!  Grrr.. Spent the whole afternoon in bed.  Frustration.  The great thing is that by laying down flat for many hours, I was able to stop the increasing pain and did not take any medication.  I never know what is going to happen next.  I guess life stays interesting that way.

One thing at a time things are getting done around here!  That is exciting all on its own.  Jason got part of the yard done, I have mostly clean floors in the house, I forgot to ask Jason to finish the last two.  (not his favorite thing)  While I have been hurting some, when I am not I am up pittering around doing things, the dishes are done!!  Yea!  I am going to fold some laundry soon!  So that will be great!  I have started sorting the clothes winter ones need to be packed away.  They take up so much room!  It will be so nice to have that done!

I even had an egg for breakfast!  It was wonderful!  I did my cleanse and had an egg and a piece of toast!  A shake for lunch and and apple for a snack!  I have been marinating a steak, hoping that Jason would be able to eat it with me.  ( might have to wait a while longer for that.. I think I need to cook it up tonight anyway ) I had planned to make it for us for lunch.. but he was gone waiting for emergencies..

Well, I did not have the steak for supper.  I made a meal from leftovers.  It was fabulous.  I am thrilled I could be up and cook something!  Some days that is so difficult for me to do.  I love to do it but some days it just is not possible.  It was today, that is something wonderful to be thankful for!  Especially after my afternoon. 





I think I am managing things better.  At least I hope so.  I am trying to.  The birds are helping.  Wish I had some more energy, that is for sure.



Hopefully they will figure out what is going on soon with the phone systems.  It is not a good situation.  He just called he is done with his class.  He will be home soon, in time to go to sleep.


Of course there are emergencies and things going on all over the world.  Medical emergencies and catastrophic weather has wreaked havoc like mad.  It really puts things into perspective.  We each do what we can and consider others and what they are going through.  I like the thought of each one reach one.  Do something nice and unexpected for someone else today.  You never know who is having a rough day or going through something that a little unexpected cheer would make better.

I love it when my day has been brightened, and I love brightening other people's day as well!  I am going to think of some more things I can do..

In addition I would like to mention that today is National Autism Awareness Day!  I encourage you to learn about one of the most inspirational people I know. ( I don't know her personally of course.)   She has Autism and is amazing to me!



Hope your day has been brightened or you've brightened someone's day!

Blessings,
Pink Doberman

Thursday, April 1, 2010

NoT tOo BaD!

Happy April 1st!  No Jokes here... I am not good at those, they always seem to back fire or really irritate someone..  So just the normal happy it is SpRiNG thing!!

So excited about Spring!  Have I mentioned that yet?  Really excited!  I mean REALLY!  I am watching 4 rabbits running through the alley of the block next to ours.  They are out having fun, playing hopscotch, the birds are eating out of our bird feeder that just yesterday I placed outside my window!  We ave red birds, blue birds, black birds, brown birds.. so many birds.  I have the windows open and am listening to them all chatter!  It is so wonderful!  Not to mention the beautiful sunshine that we have been having and the warm lovely weather!  Oh MY!  This girl is so much happier! 

I slept all morning, another migraine.. with a whole pile of medication to get rid of it.. by two I was able to be up and around a bit, so I continued to work on getting the house in shape a bit! After yet another night of not sleeping I've had a really good day!  I've even gone out and gotten the mail!  Woo Hoo! 

The eggs I thought were going to be delivered to day never came.. UGGG... because I also have managed to get the potatoes baked, and the squash baked as well..   So this will mean no eggs for Luka this batch..  as the eggs need to go in with the hot potatoes.  What do they say about the best laid plans??  Just gotta smile..

I didn't get any gardening stuff done today, my neck is still pretty sore from being up so much yesterday.  So after being up for a while I am back to resting..  I suppose that will do.. The interesting things outside are keeping me company and driving Luka nuts..

Luka is laying here frustrated because all of the other dogs in the neighborhood start barking at things every once in a while..  He'd love to get outside and join them.  Sadly for him that is not what I am up for today.  I had planned to sit outside.. I kind of did, by opening up the windows I could get the best of it with out getting more tired!  I had a good day!  I am glad! 



I just love this picture!  Jason does such a nice job!  He took Luka out to play and got some great pictures of him too! 

While I am thrilled the snow is gone!  I do love some of the pictures that Jason took this past winter.  I truly think it was the thing that made the winter survivable for me! 

Well, for now Tchau! 
Pink Doberman